What will i do

2008-08-30T01:38:00.004+08:00

MOVED.

http://thegreeneffect.livejournal.com

partially locked.

bye bye blogger.
but the memories will still remain.

and all that was left will still be there...

2008-08-28T21:45:00.004+08:00

Listening to: Cannonball by Damien Rice
(Song was playing on manda's blog and i really liked it).
Youtube version playing:
Radio Mix verison, video playing of One Tree Hill (someday i wanna watch the show again becos i only watched it in bits and pieces)

there’s still a little bit of your taste in my mouth
there’s still a little bit of you laced with my doubt
it’s still a little hard to say what's going on

there’s still a little bit of your ghost your witness
there’s still a little bit of your face i haven't kissed
you step a little closer each day
that I can´t say what´s going on

stones taught me to fly
love, it taught me to lie
life, it taught me to die
so it's not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball

there’s still a little bit of your song in my ear
there’s still a little bit of your words i long to hear
you step a little closer to me
so close that I can´t see what´s going on

stones taught me to fly
love taught me to lie
life taught me to die
so its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannon..

stones taught me to fly
love taught me to cry
so come on courage, teach me to be shy
'cos its not hard to fall,

and I don't want to scare her
its not hard to fall
and i don't want to lose
its not hard to grow
when you know that you just don't know

___________________________________________________________

i made a very big mistake today at work and it more or less affected my mood for the entire day.
my mind was really preoccupied with various things but there was excuse for that.
no one really scolded me for the mistake but a mistake made was more or less an imperfection.
it tainted the rest of the day.

taka was crazy yesterday and good thing its not so crazy today.
ive been put in charge of the taka event for the past week.
my ic has been busy with other things so i have been managing it and then reporting to her.
im quite relieved that i wont have to carry that responsiblity after this week.
its quite tiring honestly.
and perhaps i feel like that too becos i havent had a good rest for quite a while.
im being posted to harbourfront centre's fila retail outlet tmr.
its full shift and i dont really mind because it ends at abt 930 or 945pm, which is one of the outlets to end early.
also, its my last day with fila tmr.
holiday for 2 weeks (with cca meetings here and there) and then its back to school.
freaking results are coming out next week.
im scared out of my eyes but i have to chill..

comex on saturday to buy a hdd.
and then meeting friends next week!
socio girls on wed, shokudo.
(sorry that khai cant come along but we remember you ok! hahaha. we shld stick ur pic on a chair or something. take care and talk to you soon!)
ive only ever been there once before.
and the queue was mad, although we managed to fast forward that time or something.
anyway, we're meeting early so shld be alright.
havent seen u guys in ages!
catch up!
and then meeting manda on thurs.
havent seen u in donkey years ok (ok since u sent me off to london, heh).
i think for the rest of the week, im either gonna just slack at home or something.

made a discovery.
not something i was hoping to find or see.
but i did anyway and i cant un-see it or un-discover it.
so i guess thats just the way the story goes...
something inside me wished i didnt get to see it at all.
because now i cant ignore it nor can i sit and remain at status quo.
someone give me the reverse button now please.

2008-08-24T23:59:00.003+08:00

listening to champagne supernova but oasis
how many special people change, how many lives are living strange?

literally
i blogged just now about something bothering me but i deleted it again.
no point saying anything here anyway.
and friendsforever is seriously bullshit.
i dont understand why we ever believed it as a child anyway.
what crap.

work.
work will be at taka this week.
afternoon shift for monday's event and friday's retail.
full shift for tuesday and morning shift for wednesday and thursday.
thank you for not giving me crazy full shifts for continuous days although i was originally rostered for it as i was supposedly the part timer ic.
2 more weeks of work and then im done.
one week of holidays before i return to school.
results will be back soon.
i dont really knw what to expect.

i've been busy and whatevers' been bothering me has been put to the back of my mind.
i dont usually dream but i had a dream 2 nights ago.
are dreams really signals or are they just intuitive knowledge?
dont know, dont care for now.
will come back to it when im less bogged down with things to do.

IT show or PC show or whatever u call it next weekend.
going on saturday to buy a hdd to put in stuff.
but first, i have to brace myself for the crowd.
the crowd, i definitely hate.
suntec's gonna be mad again.
and im gonna escape from suntec right after church on sunday.
its gonna be freakily and insanely crowded.
far away is where im going.
on 2nd thoughts, seeing it will be the last day, the deals might be better...
hmmm..

i need a break and plenty of sleep.
maybe coffee.

work tmr so bye!

2008-08-23T00:40:00.006+08:00

As I was rearranging and folding some core polos at the event, a man walks up to me and asks, "Hi is this the real (insert brand name)?"

obviously taken aback by the random question, i turned to him, frowned for a split second and then smiled to be polite and said, "Yes sir indeed it is."
not satisfied with my answer, he goes on, as if trying to leave me dumbfounded, which i already was by the way.
"Then do you have a rainning shoe?"

Thinking that i must have heard wrongly and seeing that he was fiddling with the women's flats we had on display, I double check, "A ladies shoe?"

and he looks at me and says, "No, a rainning shoe."
This time, I realised my mistake. He must have meant running shoe! So to be sure i said, "Oh a running shoe!"

and he looks at me like i've gone mad.
"No. I said a rainning shoe."
He emphasized on the word "rainning" like i was stupid enough not to know what rain was.
Extremely puzzled by now, I enquire futher "what kind?"
and this time he smiles, happy that i understood him and he said with much relief but much to my dismay and/or horror "A slipper kind of shoe."

By now, i've already dropped what i was doing and a part-timer friend was standing close by, eavesdropping but ready to drop what she was doing and help too if required.
Not willing to give up, i tried again "Would you like a slipper or a shoe? Or are you referring to a sandal?"

The man frowns once again, showing how unpleased he was.
In his head, I was probably the worst salesgirl ever in history because I couldn't understand what he wanted.
With much dissatisfaction, he says, "No its not any of it. Its a slipper kind of shoe."

and so I decide to enquire further to check if i could really help this customer.
"How does it look like?"
but even more to my horror and this finally caved in on me, he said "It looks like a slipper kind of shoe." and smiled, happy with himself that he had now told me exactly what he wanted.

I finally gave up and said, "Sorry Sir, I don't think we have such shoes. But do look around, maybe you'll see it."

and all the other part timers, having heard the whole thing by now, walked away with their backs to him, laughing as silently as they could.

2008-08-21T21:16:00.004+08:00

fila has started its sports event tog with other brands like kappa, everlast and mizuno at the talking hall in taka, basement 1.
i was there to help and setup the place today.
apparently, i wasnt supposed to work for events, but for retail instead.
retail preferred me to take up their roster but events needed people and rostered me the moment they could.
anyway, im doing half half next week i suppose, but it'll be all at taka, either talking hall or the fila retail corner itself.
the good thing about working in taka is that i dont have to do cashiering and handle money, i'm always doubtful about handling money that isnt mine.
the bad thing about it is that i have to walk really far from orchard mrt because the entrance area for staff is at the other end of taka and its huge.
so full shift tmr and then for the whole of next week, except for thurs.
i might be rostered for retail, if not then i have a day off.
which is good too considering that i dont have a social life or much time to myself since i started working.
im really exhausted and i fall asleep standing on the train only to wake up to the jerk of the train when it brakes.
im considering ending work on the 5th of sept so that i have a week off before school begins.

and speaking of school, i have been allocated my new event for the year in the student council.
they gave me dinner and dance and my first thought was that its too close to the mock exams.
but its not a bad thing after all becos its definitely a change from pageant or bash.
i have til 24th aug to decide.
i cant decide.
......

i think i really need a good break before sch starts.
i havent had a proper good break where i cld sleep properly or breathe and have time to myself since exams ended in may.
ok maybe i did, the week right after exams.
but since then, it has been never ending planning for london, getting my paperwork done, bank stuff, visas, blah.
then i finally went to london, studied, did this and that, slept very little, went sight seeing, studied whatever i cld.
and when i came back, it was a week of total hell becos i was trying to recover rom jetlag and then non stop 15 hr work every freaking single day for the whole 7 days straight.
and now, retail. yeah but events kind of stole me.
so yes, i freaking need a break where i can do what i want whenever i want with whomever i want with whatever i want.
and what do i want to do?
alot of things.
and one of it is to get a really good book, get a table cloth from daiso, bring a basket of food and a cooler with nice cool ribena and sit on the beach and read my really good book.
don't be fooled.
i am a extreme bimbo trying very hard to nerd-fy myself.
and i hope its working.

2008-08-16T18:59:00.002+08:00

Listening to Chasing pavements by Adele

I'm preparing my move from blogger to livejournal so that i can partially lock it.
but i'm waiting for the basic account to be reinstated so that the ugly advertisements will not be there.
however, ugly ads will still be visible to non livejournal users.
oh well, trade offs.
also, unlike blogger, i wont have a side bar to put misc stuff so lets see how i can solve that too.
and my layout will definitely be much simplier than this blogger one.
once everything's solved and up and running, i will start adding livejournal accounts or comment to be added.
you will be notified here.
and i specially set up an account for close friends who do not have an lj account and wish to see my locked entries as well.
please do not feel offended if i dont add you back or give you that account.
and no selling journals please unless you're my friend and ur only lj is a selling journal. =)
too much viewership on my so called life is cornering me.

work roster for the following wk comes out on sunday night, so i will blog about it again.

im still in the process of yadada-ing through my photos taken in london because i really dont have the time and so i do it when i'm not working, which is weekends and some mornings or nights, depending on which shift i'm given.
i think i'll take like forever or something la.
some are in facebook already, if you dont have an account, get one? =))
anyway, i'll be removing some when i get a hdd at the IT show.
the IT show is coming again and yes i go for every one of it.

i went by the driving centre the other day and some of the learner drivers were on test.
i kind of laughed to myself because it reminded me of how tensed i was during the test.
its been about 7 months now, in 5 months time, i can finally drive without a P-Plate!
thinking of renting a car out when i turn 20 this year.
it'll be fun.

i also went by toa payoh the other day at lorong 1 and everything was so familiar.
man, i do miss the food there.
but thinking about it now, working at sbs was really a luxury...

bubble tea in singapore is ten times cheaper than that in london.
bubble tea is in my blood.
i will go cold turkey without it.
just kidding! but u get the idea.
passion fruit green tea with mini pearls helps me to relieve my stress.
throw in some kimchi and its the ultimate stress reducer.

i havent gained back my weight lost from london yet because i've been working alot.
I DONT WANT TO BE THE FAT SISTER! =)

2008-08-12T00:28:00.003+08:00

All fall down by one republic.
one of my friends managed to get into singfest and said one republic was the best.
=)
i wish i was able to make it to singfest!

ive decided not to join the standard chartered marathon.
i want to save money.

short post.
sleeping soon for work tmr.
just wanted to post up this song.

2008-08-11T10:03:00.003+08:00

Listening to: how to save a life by the fray

yes i've been working for 14 - 15 hrs daily for the past week for the fila event.
its so mentally and physically exhausting.
i think singaporean shoppers need to exercise abit of consideration for others, for other shoppers and for us retail staff as well.
when we start barricading the area and start tidying up stuff and wrapping them up, it clearly shows that we are closing.
i mean, come on, its already 1030pm.
the mall is closing.
like why are you still indifferent to that and why in the world are you still shopping at this hour?
and please for the love of cows, do not mess up what i have taken ages to tidy up.
you take barely a few seconds to mess the entire wagon up while i take a good few minutes to tidy it up.
its freaking 11am and i want to go home.
but no, we have to fold every single thing and sort them out into the correct wagons.
only then can we go home.
at what time?
1am.
and what time do i report for work the next day again?
930am.
when i clearly live in tampines.
and ps is at dhoby ghaut.
i have to take the bus, take the mrt and then switch to the north-west line.
where do i factor in sleep?
thank goodness its over though.
but they have offered me their retail work and im taking it up.
its defintely much better than event work.
=)
I'll be doing it til school starts and on weekdays only.
roster changes every week and so does location.
ive been given plaza sing for tues and wed, 1045am - 730pm and tampines mall for thurs, 130pm - close.
im not sure about friday yet.

i still miss london and some days i dream about it in my sleep.
freaky huh.
but its a really nice city.
of cos i still love singapore, but perhaps not the weather.
its too hot here.

summer school has sent me the confirming email of my grades.
transcripts will arrive in sept.
UOL shld be releasing my grades soon also i think.
the year 1s have started school.
the student council is regrouping us for our event for the year again.
hopefully i get pageant and bash again like last year.
school will be back in full swing in a month's time.
and the stress begins........

2008-08-01T12:19:00.003+08:00

Listening to: You deserve By Hillsong

Argh.
I am so angry at myself.
I have been ironing my own clothes since the age of 11.
and this is the first time ive actually burnt something.
like literally burnt, black with a hole in the middle.
and its not like some old random shirt.
it was my freaking nice dress which i only wore once in london.
arghhhhh.
im so angry at myself!

its friday today and its been about 5 days since i came home.
weather wise, its pretty burning here.

i've still not adjusted back to singapore time yet but i am doing my best.
2 nights ago, i tried to go to bed at 1am and ended up not being able to sleep at all.
on top of that, i finally got out of bed at 2am and made myself a tuna sandwich because i was so hungry (dinner time in london).
whatever it is, i have to try to quickly adjust back as i'll be working next week and it'll be long hours.
I cannot afford to be late nor can i afford to be sleepy while i work.

i've been unpacking and doing endless washing and ironing
on top of that, im still trying to sort out the 3000+ pics and videos and uploading them onto facebook lest anything happens to this laptop.
i took so many pics because i wanted to "bring london home".
i wanted to remember most of my experience.
its just too bad that i didnt take that many pics with my friends.
but im glad my other friends did and uploaded the group pics onto facebook.

i got my grades for summer school already thanks to Axel who helped me check despite him being busy.
and thanks to God who helped me through and gave me this grades.
I've never done well in anything before (truthfully) and i can more or less say this is my first achievement.
im going to treat myself one day.
haha it sounds pathetic i know.
but i'm really happy and motivated to do better in life.
i was honestly freaking happy.
because the finals were really tough.
OH MAN!

now i await my actual school results from UOL and i pray that they turn out good.

im going back to church this sunday and it doesnt matter that i have to queue for an hour.
but i would really like to go back to the hillsong church in london one day again.

work begins on monday at PS with long hours.
i will be working right through national day as well for one entire week.
long hours begin.
but its just for a week.

i am still depressed from leaving london.
somehow i think that as time stretches and goes by, my friends will all forget each other and me.
and i dont want that to happen.
if only summer school was longer.
but what good would it do, bonds will be stronger, parting will be tougher.
i really enjoyed the lse summer school and i enjoyed london.
and i wished it didnt have to be so short.

im jetlagged and depresssed.
leave me and let me be.

/edit/
standard chartered marathon registration is open.
and i want to catch the early bird promo thing.
who is gamed for it?
i might join the 10km one (crap man dont know if can tahan and run the full thing).
but i will train my knees for it.
but its damn expensive!
anyway, will discuss with my sister, if not my friends.
i know i walked alot in london.
but this is running not walking!
plus i got to sit in between here and there.
time to start training again.
im going running later.

2008-07-29T21:25:00.005+08:00

Listening to: Your name high by Hillsong (this is our God album)

Your Name High - Hillsong Live

just before i got into the cab, i cldnt hold back the tears.
i really miss everyone.
thanks all for the great experience.
thanks to my sister who paid it all for me. heh.

the 13 hr plane ride back home was the worse in my life.
it was turbulence after turbulence.
thanks to roomie for the support given.
freaking flight.
and when i land, the first thing my sister does is not ask if im alright or whether im okay.
do u know what was the first thing she asked me when i landed?
haha, what in the world man sis!

anyway, i was suffering from jetlag, hang over and exhaustion from the flight, i collapsed on my bed after a good shower after dinner that day.
but last night, i cldnt get to sleep last night til 330am even though i tried to turn in at about 130am.
and then i had a hard time waking up in time to go collect my fila uniform.

after that i met pris and we saw the brazil football team in airport!

friday meeting anna and engtian.
whoots, havent seen u guys in about a million years.

but.
i need to start unpacking more of my luggage tmr.

my stomach isnt adjusting well to the meal timings either.
apparently, it wasnt very welcoming to food at unfamilar timings and so i had to suffer the consequences til now.
why cant the world just have a uniform timing and all.
this is so frustrating.

and my grades are out already ourside the summer school office but i cant check it cos im not there. argh.
just have to wait for my transcripts.
the wait is tormenting.

2008-07-26T01:01:00.003+08:00

listening to: how to save a life by the fray

last day of school today.
or rather, just finals today.
party tonight.
or now rather.
going soon.

pubbing tonight.
a little expensive.
but last night in london already.
and everyone's like going or something.
i dont plan on sleeping early also.
becos i also have to pack.

please please please dont let it be over the weight.

2008-07-25T02:04:00.003+08:00

listening to: yellow by coldplay

thank God for my mid term results
thank God for keeping me safe
thank God for my sister who sponsored me to london
thank God for my family who has been so supportive of me throughout the entire time
thank God for everything in my life.

In all things,
Thank God.

i want to go to new creation church next week.

finals tmr, off i go now.
mug.
and pray
=)

__________________________________________________________________

Oh before i forget,
today we were in the room and eileen suddenly backed away from her laptop very silently with her eyes wide open.
i stared at her for a while and tried to look in her direction and she said that there was a wasp.
true enough, i saw it, huge and black with red stripes.
and then it moved barely a centimeter and we both screamed and ducked.
we slowly got up and looked again. it didnt want to go away.
fianlly, we called melissa for help who came down and tried to help us.
she took like a piece of scrap paper and gingerly tried to scoop up the wasp.
but.
it moved again and this time we all screamed.
the image of us screaming just becos the wasp moved a little was really funny.

credits to melissa for helping us get rid of the wasp.
what a way to start our morning.

2008-07-24T07:28:00.002+08:00

listening to: collide by howie day

i plugged my green mp3 into my ears today and power walked to school.
it took me barely 10 minutes rather than the usual 15 minutes.

mid term results still arent back yet.
apparently they are waiting for approval.
finals are this friday.
i shld get down to serious business.
been going out almost every night after classes to hang out with friends.
i have classes in the monring tmr but not lectures.
so i will do my studying tmr.
but i have no idea what im gonna do on friday after exams seeing that i finish so early.

after class i went with friends to white hart, the pub just beside high holborn.
i had a pint of strongbold cider beer.
not bad.
i generally dont like the smell n taste of beer.
but this was alright.
i talked with a friend of mine about our different cultures and systems of our countries.
it was like a culture exchange class but it was fun, a thousand times more fun.
there was a guy who tried something funny but i was smarter of course.
he gave up eventually.
Senay and I left after that.

i have no idea what im gonna do on friday after exams and after the leaving party.

its my last few days in london and the feeling of depression from leaving my friends is setting in.
summer school - all time.

2008-07-22T05:25:00.002+08:00

listening to: carry you by james blunt (love most of his songs and im gonna get the chords for them on guitar when i get back to singapore).

i slept at about 130am this morning and its one of the earliest days ive slept so far.
walking back from tate modern and all the other walkings ive done have tired me out.
totally.
the moment i hit the pillow and hide under the sheets (freaking cold weather ok!), i fall into peaceful sleep (well not really becos ive been having nightmares recently, i will pray about it) and when i wake up to my alarm, it feels like 1 second later.

after breakfast this morning i went back to UOL to get myself a pullover and tshirts (at discounted prices becos they were the last pieces in the size i wanted).
UOL is beautiful.
i love it here.
i mean i went there yesterday but the student's union shop wasnt open.
and when i walked there yesterday, i had to constantly check the map.
i really like how i can walk along the streets and know exactly where i am and im able to enjoy the scenery without the hassle of constantly looking at the map.
its the being able to fully appreciate the full essence of the place that i really like alot.

then class, lunch and then lecture.

went to the dark knight batman premiere with friends at leicester square.
crowded.
or jam packed rather.
i got a glance of the casts before i finally left because it got too much for me.
it was way too crowded for me.
crowds, i dislike.
unless its new creation church.

i grabbed dinner and came back to eat it and chatted with a friend in my kitchen.
we didnt keep track of time but we chatted til 930pm.
but we both returned to our rooms after that becos i had things to do.

word is spreading.
dont make fun of me ok!
anyway, hope word wont spread too far n whoever hears it, forgets it.

leaving for singapore this saturday.
i think im going to be extremely upset when i have to leave holborn to go to the airport and return home.
its not that i dont miss home.
but ive really had friends here.
anyway, it was a fantastic experience.
but i have to return to reality.

mid terms results are supposed to be out but they arent on the web yet.
oh the torment!

2008-07-21T04:12:00.007+08:00

listening to: all the small things by blink 182 (they played this on riverboat and we were like singing along with it. freaking cheesy.)

yesterday i woke up, had breakfast and then went to tate britain in the morning to view art pieces.
i think that art previously held more meaning than modern art.
i cannot find it in myself to appreciate modern art.
so i kind of went through the various art galleries they had.

and then i had lunch at the victoria london station.
wicked after that, with the girls at the apollo victoria theatre.
its my first musical and its fantastic.
the witch had a freaking good voice.
its so amazing, i cant believe that such a voice actually exists.
no seiously.
its so surreal.
but anyway, it was awesome.
and considering that i got a student price for the thing.

hyde park after that.
met classmate for dinner.
we walked towards hyde park and park lane.
after dinner we ended up at picaddilly circus and she walked home becos its near for her and i took the bus.
buses in london are generally cheaper.
so i take the bus whenever available.
sometimes i take the bus to lse and walk the 15mins back to dorm.

this morning, i woke up and went to UOL after breakfast.
its so huge!
and really nice.
i think i was consumed with so much emotions that when i stepped onto the UOL grounds i was so thankful to tears.
took plenty of pics.
i am returning there tmr morning to get myself some UOL merchandise (will put under my own tab).

i came back to rest for a while and then i met another classmate for church.
i went down to the reception to wait and they were blasting james blunt into the speakers.
and i decided that all his songs are not bad.
tears and rain is still my wake up alarm and will always be for a long time.
(my mind can only wake up to that song).
anyway, london's hillsong church!
IT WAS SO AMAZING OK.
like suddenly i was being transported back home to new creation church all over again.
becos the london hillsong church is a grace church too.
and their worship is exactly like new creation's one.
anyway, they showed pastor prince also.
good sermon, good service, was rejuvenated and happy after that.

then came back to have lunch.

went out again.
this time, took the tube to st. paul's.
so st. paul's, millenium bridge, tate modern and shakespeare's globe.
and then i walked all the way back from there.
it took me about an hour.

i rested again.
and then i went to chinatown to have dinner.
i had beef noodles!!
do u know happy i am?
i couldnt find kimchi though.
chinatown made me smile alot.
i managed to identify some singaporeans and smiled to myself secretly.
i knew they were singaporeans for 2 reasons.
1. the singlish they spoke
2. the fact that they were saying, "lets go see if the other shop sells it at a cheaper price before deciding".

I am going home to have bubble tea, beef noodles, kimchi and watch the oc and scrubs.

work also starts when im back.

i am so tired now
im gonna wash up
and hope i am able to do my readings before i sleep
but i doubt it

2008-07-19T00:31:00.003+08:00

ever since mid terms ended, the things we learn have become tougher and its all different now.
im getting my paper back on monday.
the torment..

river boat disco was awesome.
after lecture, i practically zoomed back to dorm.
i walked really fast, faster than my normally-already-fast pace.
so it was practically running.
then we all dolled up and off we went towards the pier at tower hill, near the tower bridge.
the boat took off at about 815pm and we went under the tower bridge towards the other side of london where the millenium dome and thames river barrier were.
we saw both.
the views from the boat was spectecular and breath taking.
i know this probably sounds like such a nerd and stuff.
but i really had a good time just having my hair blown in the wind and looking out at the view..
although yes, it was freezing.
the company was great too!
and we had fun dancing in our groups, doing stupid steps and laughing our heads off, forgeting everything we have on mind.
i had a great great time.
for many other reasons too.

yesterday after lecture, we went to get tickets for wicked but it was sold out.
we queued for ages.
we bought the saturday afternoon show anyway at the discounted price instead of the full price.
then to chinatown for dinner.
and back to the same place we went to last week for dinner.
i had beef chow mien!
haha.
i freaking miss beef noodles and kimchi okay.
and bubble tea too.
anyway, my beef chow mien was extra spicy.
can u imagine the smile on my face while i eating it...
it was like =D

anyway, they went to the pub near school but i wanted to walk over to gray's inn chapel since its so near.
so i walked there and oh man!
its beautiful..
snap pictures, here and there.
and i walked further down the street and saw another church and took more pictures.
the churches here are beautiful.
no, seriously.
it got dark so i walked back after that.

today we went to harrods to look around.
but not buy anything.
i mean at these prices...
yeah then we had dinner and came back.
i wanted to go pubbing with them.
but i am really not willing to pay the entrance fee.

its my final full weekend for my london trip.
ive got to plan what to do.
hillsong church on sunday!

2008-07-16T15:02:00.002+08:00

mid terms yesterday and thats done.
i finished early and i was so happy.
i took the bus from school to waterloo and walked over to the golden jubilee bridge in search of the london eye.
and there it was.
another huge ass thing.
its really not that hard to miss.
I had to walk quite a distance though.
becos it was near westminister bridge and i was at goldne jubilee.
but first, i sat along the bank facing big ben, houses of parliament and the defense ministry houses, and i ate my lunch which was a sandwhich from sainsbury.
it was very windy but a very nice place to take it slow n have lunch.

after that was done, i walked further up and there were alot of buskers around, very creative ones..
and then i got in queue for what seemed forever and finally got my ticket for the london eye.
so up i went.
it was scary at first becos i have an immense fear of heights.
but the view was fantastic, absolutely breath taking.
I saw train stations and the crossing of many tracks, the palace, hourse guards area, big ben n houses or parliament, westminister abbey, etc.
it was great.

it was done almost too fast!
i wished it didnt end.
anyway, then i walked over to westminister bridge and then walked over to the ministry of defense house and there were near by buildings, i have no idea what they were as they were not on my map.
then i spotted hourse guards and i went over and explored.

it got from so cold to so hot.
i tried to walk home but it was too far and it was getting hotter.
I cldnt find a bus that went back to my dorm.
so in the end, i took the tube.

i rested for a while in dorm then we went out to hamley's toystore, another huge ass thing, toystore rather.
then we went to have dinner to celebrate eileen's birthday.

i guess its back to school today
argh!

2008-07-14T04:16:00.003+08:00

i woke up early today and went to buckingham palace in the morning to see the changing of guards.
we went slightly late so when we reached there, it was jam packed.
and yes thanks to my roomie who kept the time check duirng breakfast and walked very fast and all at first to check the tube thingy so that we wont waste time like figruing stuff like that out.
we cldnt see much but what the heck, we saw the guards march in and out.
i took a million pics and videos which i will upload when im back in sg.
the changing of guards was done in the palace n it we cldnt see it cos it was closed.
and multitudes blocked the gates to the palace.
anyway, we caught sight of them when they came out after the entire thing n i managed to take a peek here n there thru videos on my cam n by tip toe-ing.

after that we headed to westminister catheral.
they were having service inside.
its huge ass man.

and then we went to see big ben, houses of parliament and westminister abbey, this time during the day.
westminister abbey is huger ass.
and its so beautiful.
in fact, everything was so beautiful.
all churches here r awesome.

i managed to catch the london eye on cam also but didnt go there today.
will take it another day.

we went back to tower bridge and tower of london.
and this time it was great!
we met bryan wong along the way n he was filming for a new video.
when he took a break, we took a pic with him, all of us.
so cheesy right!
then everyone started gathering at the port area and it became quiet.
becos traffic stopped on the tower bridge.
and before u know it, it lifted.
and i whipped out my camera and took shots and videos of it.
the background talking was very funny.
then we went onto the bridge and more pics of the bridge entailed.
and then the rest went back so i went up to the tower bridge exhibition n got a discount with my isic card.
the view from the top was very nice.
and everytime i try to self take a pic, pple wld offer to help me tk a pic.
they were all very nice.
anyway, after i was done with that, i went to the tower of london.

had to tk the tube back but the nearest tube station n the next nearest was down.
so i walked 45 mins back to the one where i came from.
it was such a long walk i nearly died after that.
cos i had been walking since morning.
like since buckingham palace n all.

i wish my family was here to see all these becos its all so beautiful and i want to share it with them.
especially my mum since she hasnt seen it yet.
still, if the family could come it would have been great. =)

im going off now to finish up dinner, shower and the study.
exams r on tuesday!
and roomie's birthday is on tuesday!
we're all gonna bring her out to get her drunk! =D
update again soon!

2008-07-13T03:08:00.003+08:00

i was at the tower bridge today and i took endless pics.
but they were all gone when i tried to transfer the pics from sd card to my laptop as there was some crash in error or some shit.
i was very upset cos all my tower bridge pics r gone, which means i'll prob have to go back next wk but i dont have much time...

i was very upset.

freak.

but thanks roomie for being so nice =)

2008-07-10T03:45:00.002+08:00

the weather here has been so crazy.
one min its sunshine the other min its pouring.
its been raining and its pretty cold and its so gloomy.
what a summer!
we cldnt really sight see becos it was raining so it was tough to take pics.
hence on days that it rained, it was either museum or mugging indoors.
theres alot of studying to do and i'm really rushed for time as i have so many readings to do.

ive been having sandwiches and coffee for lunch here recently cos its very packed during lunch.
so i have it to go, or take away if u please, and i eat it elsewhere.
sometime i get coffee too cos i need to stay awake as every min counts here n i dun wanna be sleeping.
but i get so tired from all the reading n studying n walking.
i went to chinatown, soho and picadilly last night.
it pretty nice, pretty crowded at picadilly circus.
we didnt go out today cos the forecast said it'll be pouring n it is indeed pouring.
there'll be sunshine tmr but david held is gonna speak to us after class at 530pm til i have no idea what time..
hopefully the sunshine stays throughout the summer and the rain goes away.

i have exams on tuesday.
not tests, mid terms to be exact.
i have endless readings to do, so im gonna go now.

update again soon.

2008-07-08T06:41:00.003+08:00

Its the 4th day in london and my first day in school.
its about 19 degrees tops and a low 14 degrees today.
but i think it was like 16 most of the time as it kept raining.
so much for the summer they call it.
anyway, its gonna be 14 degrees tops and a low 11 degrees tmr.
im bracing myself for the worse with long sleeves and jeans.

its very cloudy in london and the weather's crazy.
one minute its sunny, the next its pouring.
i need my umbrella all the time.
anyway, thats why when we were landing in london there was terrible turbulence, i was scared!
like terrible terrible turbulence.
we "dropped" alot a few times.
and whenever it happened u can hear the groan from the entire plane of people.

so far, we've been to the national museum, science museum, british museum, covent garden and camden market.
ive made a couple of friends here in my residence and we go to sch together and sightsee together.
its really interesting to have international friends from almost everywhere.
we went out of a couple of drinks on my 2nd night here (beer here is cheaper than it is in singapore).
and they were telling me about the systems back in their homes and talking about prices.
its really fun to have alot of friends.
we also came across some singaporeans too but they werent living in high holborn like i am so we kind of lost them along the way.

today after breakfast, i went with my turkish friend to the welcome message at 10am.
breakfast was awesome btw.
the gist of what i got from the welcome msg is that this summer sch is not a holiday, its intensive and will be treated like any other course taken in LSE, blah.
ok fine, yeah whatever.
we went to check out LSE sweaters ( i might get one even though its so freaking expensive).
and then we went to the book store.
my textbook costs $60singapore dollars.
i think i might just be able to borrow it.
i mean the LSE library is supposedly the best in the world.
and its huge mind you.
but its also beautiful..
anyway, then we walked down fleet street and the strand and suddenly im in monopoly.
i used to play that game alot.
so it was funny.
everything here is just different.
even walking down the street makes it such an experience.

we got to school after that for our first lesson.
i went to class alone but made friends witha girl from hongkong.
then we went to the welcome party tog where we made another friend from russia n got us a round of white wine.
after that i headed back to the dorm and met eileen and we met the other girls to go grab dinner and then we walked like ALOT.
we walked from like 845pm to like 11pm.
we walked to trafaguar square first.
then we went to see the big ben, westminister abbey and the london eye along the river thames.
the big ben is so good in real life.
i mean yes we see it on the movies and all.
but in real life, when u see it, u just wldnt stop staring at it.
the architecture is very well done, very intricate and alot of work put into it.

alright im gonna end abruptly here.
ive got readings to do.
so update again soon...

2008-07-06T08:08:00.003+08:00

Greetings from london everyone!

i wanted to type a very long post but im too sleepy.
i will edit this post another time.

anyway, internet is up altho i said 3 days time (during the orientation tmr) becos we made some friends n they taught us how to do it up ourselves.
so im now officially contactable online.

its 815am singapore time now and 115am in london now.
off to bed, long day tmr.

wil edit this post when i have the time.

bye!

/edit 06july london time 658pm/

my days in london have been good.
ive made alot of friends and we went out for a couple of drinks last night.
eileen and i were out and about and we took alot of pictures.
i took plenty of pics and videos of the places we went to.

oh and did i tell u, i discovered that i didnt bring my money pouch over.
so i went to london with barely 40pounds.
its a good thing i have my cards with me.
then i cld draw money.

registration started today.
a group of us met in the morning to go to camden flea market first before going to school for registration.
it kept raining on and off today.
the weather is crazy.
my jeans were soaked.
but anyw, it was really cold.
like 12 - 16 degrees?
freezing.

everything's good here.
im enjoying myself.
we had a peek into the LSE library.
wow.
school's gonna start soon.
less sleep, more studying and sight seeing to do.
ive yet to see alot of places but i will soon.
i love the life here and the streets here.
ive also gotten used to the tube system already.

and did i tell you,
everything is so freaking expensive here.

alright, i wanted to say more but off i go now.
i have alot of other things to do and i have a party later below my dorm at the bar and tv room.
see u guys whenever im online =)

2008-07-03T00:40:00.004+08:00

Listening to: Qing Tian By Jay Chou

When i wake up tmr morning/afternoon, i will officially have one more day left to my fly off.
yes i know 3 wks isnt a big deal.
but its a big deal to me becos its the first trip planned all on my own.
plus i'm only still 19.
and i'm flying across the globe into another timezone, almost halfway across the world.
so yes, its a big deal to me.

im done with packing.
except for like my laptop and charger and phone and mp3.
other than that, my luggage is officially closed.
and i have no idea whether it will hit excess baggage.
but im hoping it wont.
if not i will probably have to repack in airport.

i'll be checking in at about 720am.
but my flight takes off at 905am.
i will switch my phone off at about 845am?
so dont msg me from then on already becos i dont have roaming for that phone n will prob only get the msg when im back in singapore.
i am however bringing my old number there.
anyway, i will have internet access after the first 3 days.

Thanks everyone for showing so much concern for this trip.

To my sister and mum, thanks for making this trip possible.
Thank you to my sister for fully sponsoring this trip and constantly motivating me to settle things for this trip on my own and not relying on anyone else, I've learnt alot from this.
Thank you for the endless concern as well!

To my other friends who have offered to send me off and asked whether im done with packing, thank you as well.
Evan - Thanks so much! enjoy ur holidays and we will meet when I'm back.
Socio girls (Bethia, Khai, Bin, Zf) - Thanks girls for asking after me. Sorry that i cldnt meet for dinner, promise to meet once im back.
everyone one else, thanks all! =)
Oh and to Joy - travel safe girl! u're going for a longer time than i am, do take care and enjoy uni life! a new beginning.

Eileen - haha, thanks for settling the tickets to travel there. and for meeting up and for reminding me what to bring, what to do and all. all the planning, payment, meetups. =) We're finally going! Ok although i dread he jetlag, the long hours of lessons and EXAMS, 2 infact. but never mind, lets soak up london and meet new people!

I think i've learnt alot about my friends from this trip.
and thanks to those who really showed concern.
i really appreciate it and i will meet up with u guys when im back.
thanks all!

THANK YOU SIS FOR MAKING THIS POSSIBLE!
I have the best sister in the world, london or not.
it started since i was born.
(have u guys seen the pic of my sis and me when we were younger? see facebook.)

2008-07-01T00:15:00.002+08:00

Listening to: Champagne Supernova by Oasis

Champagne Supernova - Oasis

So i managed to keep awake til 530am this morning.
(/edit: i now realise that the only reason i could do that was because i had coffee that day)
But it was a tough struggle.
But i did it anyway.
and i'm quite pleased.

i met my roomie yesterday to finalise anything else.
i think we're more or less ready to brave it out and go to london by ourselves.
i know i'm ready for whatever's coming, esp thinking about the fact that my luggage is excruciatingly heavy and i have to lug it down the tube stairs becos they dont have escalators there nor lifts.
and i think once i've managed that and once i've reached my dorm safely with my luggage, i will heave a big sigh of relief and feel like i've climbed everest or something.
ok huiling's everest ok?
ah, whatever.
anyw, im almost done with packing and ready to go.
i can feel the jitters as the departing date nears.
i think my sister is extremely worried for me, i can feel it.
that day she said, "i cant believe my baby sister is going to london alone."
its cool that i have a sister who always looks out for me and takes care of me ever since i was in pampers.
and actually, i also cant believe im going to london alone.
my mother also keeps asking if i'll be okay.
but i'm not panicking or anything.
i mean, sure, im slightly afraid becos its a foreign land that ive never been to before.
but other than that, i think i'm doing okay. hahaha.
so dont worry sis!

i watched narnia today.
im not really into shows like these, like lord of the rings and all that.
but i watched the first narnia last night on tv and anyw, mum had a free ticket so yup..
it was not bad.
the show was so long, i had to run to the toilet after the show.
oh and they had a scene from london so it was like a sneak peak before i actually go there..

how many special people change,
how many lives are living strange?

oh well..

2008-06-28T03:08:00.006+08:00

Listening to: "For the Widows in Paradise, For the Fatherless in Ypsilanti" that played in The OC season 3 when Johnny died.

if theres anything to say, if theres anything to do. if theres any other way, I'll do anything for you. i did everything for you...

Its officially less than a week before i fly off.
I am in the midst of packing still... about 45% done.
most clothes are in.
I have hand-washed the last batch, just need to iron them when they dry.
alot of other nitty gritty things still need to go in as well, like medication, blah..
settled alot of things this week.
one of which was the flu vaccination.
which made my arm hurt alot after that, like muscle ache.
but they said it was normal.
anyw, this london study trip has taught me alot.
and it has made me grow up alot.
because i did alot of things on my own, like the checking of regulations, prices, insurance, how to get where and go where do what, etc.
previously whenever i travelled, i just had to pack according to what my mother said and just followed her.
But now, i'm not just merely packing a suitcase and following someone.
I'm going on my own trip.
I may not be 20 yrs old yet.
But i feel like i took a giant leap through the planning of this trip in all aspects.
I'm excited yet scared.
what an irony of mixed feelings.

I realised that what i really like to do to chill is to sit at the pier (or breakwater if its at the beach) with a cup of bubble tea or cold coffee in hand and just stare out to sea and listening to the waves.
sitting at vivo's pier and staring out to sentosa and keppel harbour doesnt quite make the mark.
but heck, i dont have time already!
this is the best i can get and i quite like it anyway.
plus i had gloria jean's cookies and cream, delightful.
once im back, im gonna make sure its at least east coast or pasir ris.
hahaha..

I'm flying off on friday morning.
not bringing my current number with me but i will be bringing my old number though.
thats becos the roaming rates for it are lower.
need to budget where ever i can, expenses in london on books, food and travel is expected to be high.
plus, i blew off this week's entire allowance on buying stuff for the trip.
anyw, i wont have internet connection for the first 3 days, so the handphone kind of makes sense here.

Jetlag might set in becos i havent been able to stay up much recently.
i get sleepy at 1am becos i do so much during the day and i sleep very little, i am tired from the physical exhaustion.
but i still try to keep awake til about 4am anyway.

sister is flying off to australia tmr.
wont see her for a whole month.

ok im going offline now to rest.
i had a longgggg week, i need a break.
my thoughts and feelings have been put on hold in this hubbub.
everything else needs to wait, i need to make sure i get this trip right.

2008-06-23T16:05:00.013+08:00

Listening to: Labels or Love by Fergie

i woke up today at 10am, barely being able to open my eyes.
partly becos i didnt want to wake up to another day again, hai..
partly also becos i slept at about 430am last night.
good record.
but still too early for london, i cannot possibly fall asleep during lecture!

this week is packed.
packed like sardines in a can.
i blocked today out to do and settle alot of things online.
i have been at this laptop for the past few hours now and hence i am taking a break now by blogging.
roomie has sent me my e-airticket (becos she booked flight, i booked accomodation).
no change in schedule.
was looking up the london transport system and
i showed it to her.
both of us nearly went crossed eyed trying to look for particular stations.
anyw, im really tired. but im looking forward to going to london.
this has cheered me up a bit i guess.
i hope i become too busy to think about anything else.

alright guys, 2more wks before i fly off.
thanks everyone for being so nice!
sorry i cant meet everyone before i fly off, im already rushing for time.
i will see u guys and meetups when im back ok!
anyw, sch starts on 15th sept, so i have time.
but i might work.
oh and timetable for the next academic yr is already up on the left column.
study meetups!

facebook is amazing.
i used to have friend with whom i attended preschool and church with.
we later went to the same pri school and then sec school.
we were best friends in pri school but we drifted in sec school.
anyw, i saw some activity log in the "home" of facebook and saw that her eldest sister got married.
im really happy for them.
becos i know the family.
her parents passed on during our pri school days but im so happy that the family is still so united, so close.
i cant explain to you this feeling.
im just really really happy for her..
and another thing abt facebook, my ex colleague posted up some pics of the department.
and it has my old cubicle la!
so strange to see it again.
haha..

im talking to a friend and we're talking about friends in general.
and i think the only reason why im upset is becos ive met a friend who i felt really understood me.
its not everyday that u meet someone who really clicks with you.
its like finding gold you know, or better than gold even...
so i think when its gone, u kinda get frustrated that you sort of lose a friend...
so its not the same again.
i dont know how to say la but maybe that contributed to that fact also.
i dunno la..

okay la, im going to go pack more into my suitcase already.
cant believe im really flying off..

2008-06-22T23:16:00.014+08:00

Listening to: fall at your feet by james blunt

I know I blogged a post on friday , 2 posts in fact and now its gone.
For those who have seen the posts, u probably still have no clue what im talking about becos my posts were not specific.
and i didnt take it down becos im feeling better or anything like that.
nono.
no one feels better over night and some take more time than others.
i once saw my niece on msn with her nickname as "Anger is a useless emotion of the other party doesnt care".
and i can replace the word anger with alot of other things...
like disappointment is a useless emotion if the other party doesnt care.
and effort is a useless action if the other party doesnt care.
and its for this reason that i took down the posts.
all I have left to say now is that you showed me that you are no longer the person i remembered you to be.
and im going to learn to forget and put things behind me.
friendship doesnt work one way, it goes both ways.
i dont ask for the princess treatment, but i do hope for some respect in the least, or perhaps some thanks for the efforts i made would do.
but it wont matter anymore.
becos im learning to forget, to let it past me.
i'm just highly disappointed in you for many reasons.
if i were mature enough to handle myself on friday i would have blogged this and not what i did.
anyway, in the end, i still took it down come saturday morning.
whatever, its passed and i dont want to talk about it.
im just glad mp3 players can repeatedly play the same song.
becos thats what i did on the train throughout the entire time juggling btw 2 songs though.
it was hard hearing what i felt but it was a form of venting becos it was expressing it for me.
nice song..
_____________________________________

Insomnia By Electric president (The OC season 3)

here’s a light bulb dangling from string
It’s slowly swaying up over my head now
As I jot down the words that’ll never be sung
And wait for my headache to numb
And the wind sounds as if the world’s sighing
And the moon’s just a torn fingernail
As the TV flickers and hums by the wall
And I wait for my eyesight to fade

So, So, So
It’s so damn slow
So, So, So
It’s so damn slow

And the bright-eyed choke on ambition
And the old folks circle their graves
And the young ones are busy destroying their names
And you’re still just wasting away.
I sit and watch the screen for a message
Some kinda sign that says we’re OK
But the screen stays blank till I turn the thing off
And wait for my conscience to break.

So, So, So
It’s so damn slow
So, So, So
It’s so damn slow

I hope you’re learning to listen
And I hope you’re learning to stay
And I hope you find what you’re missing
And I hope that you’re making you’re way
I’m a headcase if I don’t keep moving
And my head hurts if I don’t sit still
It’s an itch that I’ll never stop scratching
It’s a hole that I’ll never quite fill

_____________________________________________

anyway, on to other things, bethia celebrated her 21st birthday on saturday.
and when i alighted from lavendar mrt, i saw the condo and gapped at it for about a million years.
it was awesome.
no, really.
wow.
anyw so we were busy inflating balloons and hanging up stuff before the party.
they had a helium tank!
then libin talked in helium voice (where she breathed in helium and talked).
LOL. we fooled around while filling up balloons.
the hardest part was tying balloons. my fingers hurt from them but it was fun la.
we filled the ceiling with balloons. (see more in pics)
oh and while we were eating outside, we saw the flighter plane formations becos the rehearsal for ndp was going on.
one formation was of a heart! so nice! (see pics)
after that we also had a few bacardis and took some pics at the sky garden.
yeah, overall we were talking and laughing and chatting alot.
oh and u shld see the cake that she had.
totally awesome in the way it looked and tasted.
anyw, the birthday girl was shinning through out the entire night! =)
it was your night! thanks for the great party! Hope u enjoyed yourself!
~~pictures will be up when i get down to resizing them.~~ some done, waiting for the pics from her photograhper.
OH and bethia and her bf were so sweet!
awww.

anyw, ive started packing for london already.
i started throwing in clothes and what nots into my suitcase in my room.
ok i folded them nicely in the end

sister is leaving for australia soon and she wont be back in time to see me off.
so it means i wont be seeing her for about an entire month.

i like how one can feel down but dont have time to really feel the full effect of it becos one is too busy...
its like postponing feelings.
and somehow maybe it may get better.
although i highly doubt it.

i started sneezing non stop just now and had stuffy nose.
so i took vitamin c, enchinecea, zinc and 2 panadol cold reliefs.
and right now i am having a massive headache, and i went to the toilet and puked out a part of my dinner.
maybe its also becos i slept at 3am and then woke up at 7am for church.
so im going to go off now..
i have too many things to do to let this affect me.

(more photos to be added when bethia's photographer finishes editing his pics)
click somewhere below to see larger image.

ﾠ

2008-06-19T10:14:00.007+08:00

Listening to: Fix you By Coldplay

This wk's been hectic as usual.
I have endless things to do, endless.
I still need to get that flu vaccination, buy my travel insurance, study, read up on places, pack, etc.
arghhh.
my sleep time has been disrupted and my body isnt taking it well.
Been kicking in 5 - 6 hrs of sleep.
yeah my sister say's its alot and i shldnt be sleeping so much.
But my body isnt taking it well.
Its kinda like fighting it or something.
My record so far as been 430am, although 330am has been the norm and I'm supposed to sleep at 6am!
yeah i shld stop complaining already.
but thats what my blog's for anyw.

another thing to complain about.
SIM shld consider a bigger server seriously.
it took me almost half an hr to log into the system.
eCR started today.
in other words, i determined my fate for next sem/year today.
it was so jammed up that the page took forever to load.
and just like eRev, i was scolding the laptop again.
But this time not out loud la, cos zhongfen was at my house also.
it wld be weird to see my scold my own laptop.
anyw, got a 4 day sch wk but i think its poss to make it a 3day sch wk if i crash a certain lecture.
HAHA.
so its either a mon-to-thurs sch wk or mon-tues-and-thurs sch wk.
lets see what i can do to make this timetable better.
But i still have freaking make up lessons on freaking friday NIGHT and saturday afternoonS.
arghhh.
so ulu can...
but the best thing?
NO MORE 830AM CLASSES! YES!
no need to fight in the stupid morning jam anymore....
YAY.

Ive been able to squeeze in running into my schedule recently.
i need to take care of my knees more.
its been slowing me down alot of late.
but anyway, it feels good to be fit u know.
it helps me sleep better too anyway.
any form of exercise is always good.
although i still miss volleyball trainings aplenty, no matter how much i probably cursed inwardly cos of the all the stupid PTs we had to do.
But no matter, it was fun, thinking about it now.
Its too bad that i'll never be able to play volleyball on court ever again in a competition.
ah, whatever.
=(

yesterday i was returning books at the library book drop and i was in a hurry to meet the girls.
with one hand holding on to this laptop and the other dropping in the books, my finger got caught under the flap of the bookdrop.
being in a hurry and without thinking, i just yanked my finger out of the way.
the flap wasnt happy and decided to keep part of my finger, leaving a gapping laceration on my finger.
It was bleeding profusely yesterday.
but a wound is alot like life.
when u leave it open, if it gets hit in the same area again, the wound will get deeper, fresh new blood will flow and it will hurt more than it did the first time round.
the wound gets reopened as well.
that happened to me yesterday and it hurt. alot.
in the end, i summoned my courage and soaked my finger in a cup of concentrated salt water.
ouch.
but that shld work soon.
i mean, i couldnt even write yesterday and i dont have time for not being able to write!

right, okay, anyway im going off now.
bye!

and i will try....
to fix you.

2008-06-14T22:54:00.070+08:00

Listening to - I Miss you By Blink 182

Socio Girls go to Sentosa again 05/06/08

Well, Khai and Libin couldnt make it last minute.

So the rest of us went on to soak up the sun anyw.

No frisbee this time.

sad.

pictures here!

All smiles!

High after exams!

one picture 2 cameras

the green, red and grey!

island sunfun!

the millionth photo we took.

somewhere out there

nice view!

This is the view we caught from the towers at pallawan beach.
For the first time in my life, i realised that i am frightened by stairs with gaps in them.
anyw, nice view!

FlipFlops and Feet!

at pallawan, soaking up the sunnnnnnn.

aw, okay another one.
i cant believe i did that pose.
i would never do that ever, i was just being lame.

OH MAN
I love beach tram rides i tell you!
i simply love them.
nice.

awesome scene..

i think bethia and i were super bored LOL.

so scary!

come face to face with your yellowie friendly snake!

My first contact with a snake that doesnt bite.

or at least it didnt bite me.

bethia, i think the snake liked u!

scary snake.

as u can see, i was still trying to keep an eye on it at the corner of my left eye.

I am as tall as you are!

HAHA, what r u doing?

holy crap can u see that thingy that looks like a mucus?!

Laughing at how the "mucus" is hanging by his nose and since he is a statue,

he cant do anything about it but to live with the hanging and disgusting mucus.

ewww.

er what?

aww, haha.

aiyah im not as busty as u are..

another sign of how stressed we were during the exams.

LOL.

bethia, what are u doing?

yup the boobs r the centre of attraction here, no doubts about that.

standing as straight as you are!

WHAT?!

meet my new boyfriend!

a lifeguard, like archie as in archie comics.

actually i also dunno what i pointing to.

HAHA.

gimme gimme GIMME!

ok never mind la.

ahahaa, she wants it too..

aw, so sweet!

peacock peacock!!

3 female peacocks and 1 male (top roof).

unfair!

Luge right?

'uge?

See my gritted teeth smile, i was terrified!

look how happy they are on the skyride!

cool view.

notice we are going downwards here.

i think i freaked out here the most.

coolios.

One last pic in sentosa before we head off to meet the other girls in vivo!

on our way back to vivo to meet the other socio girls for dinner.

boring train ride.

socio girls meet for dinner after that.

haha, yeah im like high on coffee already..

we're all fooling around with my camera.

Yeah, fooling around with my camera even more.
we were definitely stressed during exam man.

look how crazy we're acting!

Libin showing us how other girls cry.

i think i laughed like mad here.

i asked her to pose so i can take a picture to show u.

its damn funny.

u shld see how she does it.

i laughed so much my tummy hurt that day.

ok everyone, what's with the boobs?

group pic!

socio girls, still socio girls even after socio has ended.

High after exams already!
all the nonsense, hahaha.

Okay so updates on sentosa outing!
The 2 other girls, bethia and zhongfen, and i met up at vivo and we were all late.
LOL.
we took the train thingy into sentosa, lazy to walk all the way to the bus thing.
and anyw, the train is probably faster and more frequent.
after landing up at the beach station, we took the beach tram.
beach trams are so utterly fun.
because they arent exactly cars, they're like open-air cars that drive alot of people around and the lanes that they drive through have abundant trees around.
so having a beach tram ride is like going on a nature hike but on wheels.
its so fantastc.
i like the wind that blows in my face when the tram goes really fast.
bethia and i were so hooked on it that we sat on the tram for one entire loop to past time while waiting for zf to re-enter the island (explained in later part of entry).
anyw, so we had lunch and then we just slacked at pallawan beach for 2 reasons.
we were afraid it might rain because there were dark clouds hovering around the area.
also, tanjong beach was way too far to walk and we felt that siloso might be crowded because its the school holidays.
anyw, we crossed the bridge and went up the towers and i discovered my fear of stairs with gaps!
i think i freaked out so much.
Because i'm afraid of heights so i can practically see how far away i am from the ground as i climb the stairs and get further away from the ground.
freaky.
anyw, we tanned at the beach after that.
the dark clouds went away and then the sun was out in full force.
it was so scorching hot after that.
bethia and i kept hiding under trees.
anyw, we went for animal show, random walks and beach tram rides after that.
zf had to go off for a job interview so we waited for her to come back into the island..
anyw, then zif came back and we took the skyride and half the time i was like grabbing the pole with both hands, not letting go even a finger.
then we took the luge down, freaking awesome!
anyw, met the other girls for dinner at vivo after that.
and then we had gloria jean's after dinner!
cookies and cream! hahaha, khai was super excited. so funny!
and then we discussed subjects outside. (sorry khai!)
oooo i love sitting by the pier or whatever it is.
on the big red thing...
anyw, all the details are in the pics.
next time we go must take more nonsense pics ok! like we did the last time we went to sentosa cove.
http://thegreeneffect.blogspot.com/2008_02_01_archive.html
(scroll to 14th feb post).

london has sent me flying and driving me crazy.
apart from ripping me off, i have endless things to do.
wisdom tooth is still ripping the daylights out of my gums.
wanted to blog more but i really have to go now.

2008-06-11T01:17:00.008+08:00

Listening to: Witch Doctor by the Chipmunks

its damn funny leh!
watch this.
Think i wanna watch the movie, looks funny.
anyway the only reason why im so into the chipmunks is because my sister and i grew up watching them, as in the cartoon.
we used to have all their tapes and we'll see them all the time.
what good old days.

this is damn funny too:

Ok updates for my week.
haven't blogged in a while and thats because im still editing the sentosa pics.
sentosa post will be up soon once im done with the pics, im resizing them but recently i dont really have the time to do alot of things.

anyway, yes so thursday was sentosa day with the socio girls.
Unfortunately, Khai and Bin couldnt make it.
so it was left with Zf, bethia and me.
ok more on it in the sentosa post that i will post up when im done with all the pics ok.
hope the whole socio gang can meet again before i fly off.
bethia's party right? =)

Okay and then friday it was back to work again with anna.
we realised how super strong she is and how weak I am.
talked alot about our past volleyball days.
volleyball! =)
anyw, she accompanied me baby shopping.
I was on the verge of having the fits i tell you.
I didnt know what to get.

Saturday my ex boss, manager, held this get-together at this house to celebrate the birth of his baby girl.
awww.
everyone was chatting and laughing and i mean theres a blanket of murmurs when everyone talks at the same time right.
but the baby slept through the entire thing.
and one of them were joking about the baby not wanting to be carried so she remained asleep.
anyw, it was nice to see everyone again.
the other time, i only met the marketing people.
but this time, i got to see the planning people too.
Oh oh and some of them brought like their kids.
so there were so many kids around the house.
At that point of time, i felt so young u know.
like everyone has kids already.
but then again they are older than me.
anyw, it was fun lah.

I've been so busy lately i havent had time to do alot of things.
very frustrating.
But. I managed to squeeze in running last night and tonight.
Man, i still remember back in my volleyball days where i was so fit and trained so much.
But i guess it has its implications too.
Last night after barely running for 100m, i felt the sharp pain pierce through my right knee first.
Then few metres down the path, the one in the left knee set in.
Its been a while since I felt it.
The past few runs were without a glitch.
So when the pain resufaced yesterday I was like, OW.
Just now i went running with my sister.
and I reminded myself to put on knee supports.
I think they are so irritating.
but oh well.
How to run standard chartered u tell me?
arghhhhhhhhhh.
so frustrating.

another frustrating thing?
my prep for london.
I mean its fun and all, it really is.
but it grates on my nerves that they charge me for every nitty gritty thing.
And its not just the fact that they charge me that pisses me off, they charge me alot.
like, WHY ARE U RIPPING ME OFF?
i even have to pay for the usage of the safe in my dorm.
anyw, ive yet to settle bank accounts, flu jab and my travel insurance.
i will get down to it soon.
But at least theres good progress since last week.

the last frustrating thing:
choosing subjects for the next academic year.
eCR is going to be up soon.
so I need to decide soon.
so many subjects, so little choices, so little time.

my head is going to explode from all the thinking.
its so saturated to the point that i stop thinking about things i used to think of naturally everyday.
i have to remind myself to think of them, good grief.
thats how much things are in my head.
crap man.

anyw, anyone interested to go to the PC show with me?
argh. go alone so boring...

alright, off i go, i have just about a million things to do but my eyelids are heavy from the terrible lack of sleep.

/edit/
this song makes me wanna cry whenever i hear it.
so sad..

here you go:

2008-06-05T00:25:00.003+08:00

I slept last night, or this morning rather, at about 3am and had to get up at 630am.
Working with Anna today and friday. (thanks!)
It isnt so bad when u can talk while doing things you know.
The pay isnt very motivating.
But I cant find a job that fits my schedule, considering that I am flying off in a month's time.
(HOLY CRAP ONLY ONE MONTH LEFT).
anyw, my friend said pc show might need people.
But i cant find anyone that needs people for it!
anyhow, i am going for the pc show, i always go for all the pc shows and comex.
so it'll be a bonus if i manage to get a job there.

anyway, i drove out of the carpark from my block to the slip road today.
slow, but i did it anyway, there were alot of turns ok!
its the first time I drove an auto car and the first time i did since i passed in Jan.
yeah it was like going into circuit again, cold sweat. hahaha.
but it was so fun lah!
fun fun fun.
yeahyeah make fun of me lor..
freak man, i miss driving.

I like new beginnings.
esp if they are friendships.
or friendship in this case.
and its nice to be cared for also.
as much as i care for others.

SENTOSA TMR!
its so sad that the other 2 gals cldnt join us.
but what the heck, ive been looking fwd to this soaking up of the sun for ages.

im feeling abit tired from the recent lack of sleep.

blog again another time soon.
im turning delirious from the tiredness.

2008-06-02T18:35:00.008+08:00

Listening to:

Somewhere only we know By Keane
Video of FF8, Rinoa and Squal.

About 2 years ago, back when I was in J2, I went to Canada to witness my sister's bachelors graduation.
This was the first time I travelled so far away from home.
My total flight time excluding transfer of planes and waiting time came up to about 22 hrs.
anyhow, canada is 12 hrs behind us, 11 if there's day light savings (i never understood this concept).
So what happened was, I had to adjust accordingly, my sleep time and my meals.
so what was previously night for me now becomes day and vice versa.
Basically I got slapped in the face by jet lag, which was the first time for me as well, considering that I'ver never really travelled anywhere outside my time zone, except maybe for thailand?
Even australia's barely 0.75 hrs ahead of us and china has the same time as us.
Now jet lag is a strange, strange phenomena.
At first, U convince yourself that u would not b taken down by a thing like that, no.
You struggle on the first day to beat the crap out of jetlag and you win.
you manage to stay up all day (local time at your destination) and you smirk at the jetlag.
And in all your victory, you think you've won the jetlag war.
But no.
Because when the next day comes, you are wide awake at 1am and when u finally get to sleep, you get up at 430am in the morning, both local time.
But once it hits 2 or 3pm, your eyelids get heavy.
And this isnt really about being sleepy, of course not.
This is about your entire body system.
The headaches set in, the constant feeling of nausea and fatigue, the lousy feeling.
I really really hated jetlag from then on because I fell prey to it and could not escape from it for a long long time.
and it ruined the first week of my holiday in canada.

So now that I'm off to London, I am preparing myself for the time difference.
A little early I know.
But I need time.
I've been sleeping really late and waking up really late as well.
London is 7 hrs behind (see clock at the side column of my blog).
So I should be sleeping at about 6 or 7am and waking up at about 12 or 1pm to meet london's timing.
and it should be only for 6 hrs because I have too much to do there.
And I've been staying up late at night recently.
partly because I cant sleep.
And also partly for London.
But once the clock hits about 330am, my eyelids get so heavy.
my head starts to hurt.
And I wake at about 9 or 10 plus.
Its been like that recently.
And I'm starting to feel the effects of it today.
Constant Headaches, nausea, fatigue.
My mind is in a permanent state of tiredness but it doesnt make me sleep.
its a weird feeling and its like a nagging feeling.
I hope that by the time i fly off to london, i will be able to meet the sleep timing in london without jetlag.
I dont want to have to suffer this in london.

on a lighter note,
I am meeting the socio girls for sentosa this thursday!
I AM GOING TO HAVE ALL THE FUN I WANT UNDER THE SUN AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME.
Ok maybe other than if its rains.
so please please dont rain.
I want to play frisbee!

I am cracking my head on what to get for the june/july babies, any suggestions please?
esp for those friends who are turning 21!
ok think think think....
yeah lor, i'll only be 21 next year so i havent put much thought into what a 21 year old will want?
yeah, ok bad excuse.

Met Zif today and we were talking about so many things like what to subs to take next year.
I guess everyone's really worried about results.
Because at the back of our mind, even though we go about living our lives, we're worried about exams.
I think my paper's somewhere across the alantic ocean now flying to london or it has alr reached there.
sigh...
results. =(

yesterday i was at marina and suntec looking with sister for a dress.
and i realised that she makes all crap dresses look un-crap.
HAHA.
if only i had that gene.
argh.

London packing and planning is still in my mind every minute of the day.
argh.

oh yes and random note, i bought a pair of in-ear ear phones! ok ear pieces or whatever they are called.
Its so cool.
and they are really awesome.
plus i got it at a sale.
I got it because the ones on my mp3 is going to break any second now.
its hanging by a whatever.

ok dinner soon.
I hope I can manage to stomach it.
been eating at 8 or 9 plus, due to weird timings.

ok bye!

/edit/
I do not appreciate friends rubbing things in my face.
this isnt what friends are for, excuse me for living.
If you wanna rub some salt else where, you aren't welcomed to do it on me thank you.

2008-05-31T19:36:00.004+08:00

Listening to: Stop and Stare By One Republic

Just last week I purchased a set of guitar strings.
I have been putting it off due to the hubbub arising from exams.
Also, I have been using ball-bearing strings and so I have long forgotten how to change guitar strings.
Ok maybe also because a friend of mine helped me changed the strings in the past.
Anyway, so I took the entire morning changing all the strings.
Its a good thing that I have 2 guitars, so I propped the other one up on the table and after much scrutiny, I managed to tie up the strings nicely, although one or two were slightly out of place.
Tunning was the wosrt part.
My fingers were so sore after that.
From the turning and turning of the knobs to get the right tune.
I think what was most maddening what that the strings kept running when I first played.
new strings are so utterly arghhhhhhhh.
oh well, they have stopped running already because I have been playing it for a week now.

eCR will be up in June.
Its the system used for choosing of subjects for the next academic year.
This means I will have to choose soon.
And soon is not good.
This is because I cant decide yet.
So many subjects, so little time.
Also, prerequisite means I need to have passed a certain subject.
So how would I know if I meet the prerequisites if my results are only coming out in august/september?
anyw, I still dont really know what to take because I dont know what will and what wont be relevant to my job in the future.
I really need help in deciding topics.

I need to get down to scrutinizing and planning out for London soon.
I need to plan my packing and the information I need for London as well.
Hence I am blocking out some days of the week, as some of you guys have realised.
Sorry!
I Just need to sit and do this like a good girl you know.

A friend of mine told me of a marathon that will be going on tonight and showed me the link.
Its called the sundown marathon.
At first, I was like oh okay another marathon luh huh.
But 42 and 84 km! like WTF!
who actually runs that?
Ok yeah the Std Chtd Marathon's 42Km, fine i've heard of it, blah blah blah.
But freaking 84km! who the freak runs that?
crap man, thats awesome.
and the coolios thing about this is that they run at night, unlike the normal marathons which are conducted in the mornings.
coolios.
HAHA. ok just saying.

Ive been zoning out on people very often recently.
sorry everyone!
and thanks to robby and amanda that day for like cheering me up.
HAHAHA.
that was so fun.
thanks guys.
and i hope the zoning out stops.

anyway, I have been out and about getting presents for the June/July Babies.
As I am going away in July, I will be passing u July babies your presents either before or after my trip ok.
except one lucky person who will be getting hers on the actual day (ROOMIE OF COS ITS YOU).
I dont really understand why there are so many people born in June/July.
Like are your parents seriously that free during that time of year?
ok rhetorical and random, pls ignore.

AHHHHH
got alot of things to do
i'll be back again
til next time
=)

2008-05-29T01:44:00.002+08:00

I was talking to a friend today, someone who knows me very well.
and I was talking about some recent events.
Its funny because true friends tell u straight to your face the reality of things.
they dont beat around the bush or lie to you.
true friends care and they tell you the truth, whether u like it or not, for your own good.
so even if it comes like a slap to your face about the harsh reality, its for your own good.
and I am glad my friend did.
Im glad I had a proper talking down.
This is no way to lead my life.
The outcome of it will never be a good one.

I've made a promise and I will carry it through.
You're right, thanks so much!

somebody's birthday is in 8 days time and i have a big big present for you!
who ah who ah?
=)
short post.
blog tmr maybe.
its 2 freaking AM.
but my eyelids havent even gotten heavy yet.
whatever
bye.

2008-05-26T12:03:00.008+08:00

Listening to:
Better in time by Leona Lewis

I still almost cannot believe that exams have ended and that I dont have school anymore til august.
Ok more like til July because I am afterall going to be taking an entire unit in summer school along with mid terms and finals that will take place within that 3 weeks.
This is when I need plenty of wisdom, wisdom teeth hurry up and grow!
Its kinda like neither here nor there cos only half of the teeth has showed up.
and when I mean show up, I dont mean they just appear in my gums one sunny morning when i get up from bed. no no, it doesnt happen like that.
First the back of your gums feel as sore as crap (not literally ok!) and they bleed when u eat.
and then the big fat white teeth starts ripping the daylights out of your gum and it bleeds sometimes when u eat becos the teeth is ripping through your poor gum.
it sometimes feels like my gum is giving birth to a teeth you know.
like literally.

anyway, about school.
I'm no longer a year 1 undergrad!
crap I'm getting old i tell you!
And it feels scary.
As you grow older, there are things u can no longer do.
for example, i miss mass PE in JC.
I really do.
PE teachers would tell us to run 2.4km in a certain timing and we would just take our time on the tracks, laughing and chatting and not giving a hoot.
I miss running away from school secretly before the 1255 bell rings!
MAN. that was awesome, esp during teacher's day.
I was supposed to be in the school hall taking attendance for my class because I was the chairman.
Instead, I ran away before the performance started during recess.
Boy was I in trouble.
See, you can't do these stupid things when u're older because while you get older, as much responsibilities there are, there are as much liberation from rules.
I guess there could be more at the workplace.
But that, I've yet to experience for myself.
Whats for sure though, is that my time being a student will be up in about 2 years.
And I'll definitely miss school.
Looking back, school has been great even though the exams are the pits.
But heck, we may suffer at first and then when freedom comes it hits you like a truck of relief.
There is a chinese saying like, "sian ku hou tian".
strange, and to think that I was never one to think in chinese.

I hate how people can just walk right out of my life, shut the door and then one day without knocking just waltz back right in.
Its not that I dont like it, no.
But things would have been easier and the answer obvious if you had only remained behind those shut doors and me believing that those doors will remain shut forever.
Merton was right.
Anomie puts one in an anomic position.
And there are indeed 5 different outcomes from it.
Strange.

you have to hurt in order to heal.
how do u close a wound that gets deeper every passing day?
How to u untie the knots and make the string straight again when it has knot marks?
How do u put together a broken glass when crack marks are obvious?

Anyway, exams are over and sleepless nights have not gone away.
Sleepless nights turn into nightmares almost every night and I always wake up before my alarm does.
And once I'm awake I dont usually go back to sleep til I try my best and try to.
archie comics and music is the perfect combination to kill insomia.
But lately, my body has found new resistance to it.

/edit/
i 've realised how important some friends are to me.
its time for me to make an effort and treasure these friends.
I want to be there for them when they need me.
i think thats what friends are for.
=)

oh and this week is fully booked.
please book from next wk onwards, tues is already taken!
thanks!
ps: socio girls, when do we start? =))

2008-05-23T22:36:00.004+08:00

***picture credits to my sister's blog (print screened).
[click for bigger picture]

I read this in my sister's blog just recently and even though I've read it a few times before, it never failed to make me laugh again.
So i thought of posting it up here and after soughting permission from my sis, here it is up there.
The ironic thing is that Marmite has watched me grow up.
Every time i eat porridge, i will ask for my marmite or brovil, whichever is available.
and til this day, i still feel funny eatting porridge without my marmite.

my brain is still in shock from the sudden freedom bestowed upon me.
suddenly, no daily fierce mugging is needed.
suddenly, i do not require coffee and tea to wake me up.
suddenly, i do not need to constantly keep theories and formulas in my mind.
suddenly, there is liberation.
HAHAHAHAHA.
I am so happy thay exams have ended.
you have no idea.
its the exact same feeling i had from the liberation from a levels, except probably not as crazy as As.

I AM OFFICIALLY ADDICTED TO SCRAMBLE (aka boggle) IN FACEBOOK.

short post, bye!

2008-05-22T12:38:00.002+08:00

Listening to: speeding cars by imogen heap

I never really realised how utterly tired i was from all the hubbub from exams.
from the continual mugging and lack of sleep.
everyday when i woke up, i had to brace myself for whatever was coming towards me.
It didnt matter that i felt like i've been hit in the face by a truck of fatigue.
All that mattered was that i supressed it and made sure i was able to do what was required, mainly study and get the information into my cerebrium.
So having finished the exams, i suddenly realised how tired i really am.
and it feels damn good to have finished the exams.
after one whole year of hard work, this is what it finally voices down to.
one freaking paper to determine my marks.
It doesnt matter that you screwed up throughout the year.
It doesnt matter that you forgot this and that while trying out tutorials.
But all these will matter when you do that one exam paper.
That one exam paper will determine your fate, or mine, in this context.
And now that its over, its a great relief.
I also realised that I'm no longer a year one undergrad.
Time jets, i tell you.

And it has been a great year to be honest.
I came to SIM without any friends at all.
And now look at the amount of friends I've made.
It really really surprised me.
Plus, these are friends who have been supportive.
Esp the socio girls.
Funny how life works out huh.
Thanks girls very much!

Life of an undergrad isnt that bad.
With the exception of the exams.
esp when u only have one exam to determine the fate of all that you've learnt in that entire year.

I cant find a job to sustain me til i leave for london.
its maddening because i absolutely hate the feeling of having to be dependant on my mother for any allowance for meals or what not.
at least if i worked, i would be totally independant.
Anna found a position for me for a few days but it was taken up.
yes, i was too slow.
oh well, ok i guess it gives me more time to settle the thousand and one things i need to settle for summer school.

alright, now that exams are over.
MEETUPS EVERYBODY!

2008-05-20T22:01:00.007+08:00

Listening to:
Walk On By U2

I start off this post by saying that exams are over!
Yes, Sociology paper was today and thank goodness for it.
becos there was this chapter that literally could not fit into my head and it did not come out!
definitely relieved man.
I think I freaked out at first when I saw the first question and started panicking slightly.
Anyw, after that I think it was ok.
But i practically wrote non stop for the 3 hrs and that still wasn't enough.
I couldn't get down on paper as much as I had in my mind.
There was only so much I could write within that 3 hrs and I had to write like really fast and get straight to the point.
There were times when my head was thinking faster than my hand could write i even wrote down stuff wrongly and kept cancelling.
My arm was aching so much after that it was like a resounding gong after you hit it you know.
I was like owowowowowowowowowowowow for the ten minutes after they said "pens down".
and then after that I think the urgency to go to the toilet took over and then i was like, "hurry hurry hurry."

anyway, its the relief of a lifetime!
Okay maybe not because i'll prob have to go through this hubbub next year like again.

The first thing I did after my exams was to go for a hair trim.
i haven't had one in what, 5 mths?
i just made it very layered and made it thinner.
It was awfully out of place and it had grew out thicker.

I still have to complete some house chores before i finally go out and enjoy myself.
I need to settle summer school stuff too.
I have too much on my mind.

The weather has been very unbearable these couple of weeks.
I mean, I showered 4 times yesterday.
It was terribly hot, a major frying pan out there.
Can someone please switch the heater off already?

Had nightmares last night.
Yes nightmareS, plural.
About the socio paper on the organisations question.
I kept waking up and then slipping back into the nightmare.

I hope my sleepless nights will end now that exams have ended.

2008-05-16T09:53:00.004+08:00

Listening to: Bleeding Love By Leona Lewis

POA has got me on tenterhooks.
paper's later.
I think i've seen enough POA.
Please please liberate me from POA.
I have to start socio soon.
I've more or less forgotten everything already.
jia lat.

I've changed my number.
Ive converted to starhub.
I'm officially a Hubber.
I hope most of you guys got my new number and were in the loop yesterday.
Nokia can only send a msg to a max of 20 pple at any one time.
and i kind of forgot who i stopped at for the first loop.
If you didnt get it, tell me!

selling a motorola RAZR v9, brand new in box.
if keen, do drop me a msg. sold!

short post.
=)
let this nightmare end now please!

/edit/
POA PAPER WAS @#$%^&^%$#!@#$%^
everyone was swearing and cursing when they finally said, "You may leave the hall now".
Freak you poa paper.
im actually worried about passing the paper.
I better pass, i better pass, i better pass!
I dont want to see POA ever again in my entire life.
(although i probably will take management accounting and financial management next time.)

2008-05-11T23:13:00.005+08:00

We had dinner at Straits Kitchen, Hyatt, today with my grandparents.
Credits to sister.
The food was awesome, really good.
They had peranakan food, whooots!
But it still cant beat the peranakan food that my grandma makes.
ah, whatever, still great great food.
and the service was a jaw dropper.
I'm not even exaggerating.
I was highly impressed by their service.
I mean I was drinking soup and I forgot to get one of those soup spoons so i used my metal spoon and the waiter got me a soup spoon.
and they kept replacing our utensils and even cleaned the table in between the collection of plates or bowls.
They were fast and efficient.
Very pleasing.

I keep thinking about post exams.
and it motivates me to continue striving on in my exams.
POA is driving me up the wall.
Socio will soon but im ignoring it for now.
the socio notes are calling out to me and calling my name every time i walk past them.
They are sitting at my table and staring out at me, accusing me for abandoning them but POA needs me more now!
sounds freaky eh.
ok anyway, after exams,
meet ups with you guys!!
ive already booked amanda.
like first thing when i thought about post exams, i whipped out my hp and smsed her.
hahahaha.
i also need to settle alot of stuff for summer school.
at least payment and accomodation and airline(soon) is almost settled.
so thats a whole freaking load off my mind.
and then i need to settle money and the visa thing and where to go and my course syllabus (i CANNOT fail).
its gonna be a busy holiday for me this year man.
then august its back to school with my results and all.

ok one at a time, exams first.
in the mean time, meetups pple after exams!
i have a million and one things i wanna do after exams.
=)

OK FOCUS MAN HUILINGLIN, EXAMS FIRST.
i cant decide if poa or socio is driving me up the wall more.

the abandonment of a lifetime.
i feel like ive been labelled for life.
i think my sentiments were right the first time round.
the proof is sitting right here right now right smacked in my face on my computer screen in my email.
the expected of the unexpected.
i knew this would happen.
I am indeed that label.

2008-05-09T22:47:00.005+08:00

Listening to : lack of colour - oc album mix

(i have no idea what this video is about but i like the song. cant find it on imeem.)

Thats what I feel right now, a lack of colour.
All I needed was a little cheering up or a little concern.
Things havent been great ever since the stress of exams set in.
and it got worse as the papers got smacked into my face with the examiners trying to be funny (as khai put it) or even try to be hilarious.
Ok what I mean is, the papers were hell.
I dont remember being this demoralised for an exam before.
ok perhaps for a levels.
still, i dont want to feel like that again.
words cannot describe how disappointed and angry I am at myself.
its the worse feeling in the world.
and there u are living in your bubble which doesnt contain me.
Sometimes i feel like we live in different worlds and co exist on different timezones.
I dont have the energy, capacity or time to care about this anymore.
I cant keep trying.
I cannot do this anymore.

i wish this nightmare will end soon.
i want exams to end.
i really do.
and i dont know what the outcome will be but im praying very hard.

and once again im feeling more alone than ever.
I feel like im living this life in a world where im looking out from the inside.

2008-05-07T07:33:00.003+08:00

Exams are starting tmr.
like as in less than 24 hrs i will be sitting in the exam hall determining my fate.
(ok slightly more than 24 hrs seeing that its only 7am plus now.)
its so major because I only have one chance.
ONE chance and thats it.

i slept at 2am last night and then woke up at 645am this morning.
I tried to go back to sleep after that
but i just couldn't.
I had too much on my mind.
I'm wide awake when i would usually feel tired from the lack of sleep.

Please keep me prayers throughout this period of time!
I really need it.

All the best people!
This is what we worked hard for.
This is what it finally voices down to.
This finally freaking freaky paper will determine our future.
ok, ok I promise not to panic.
I'm trying ok!
ok dont panic, dont panic.

FREAKY FREAK FREAK!

But you'll just sit tight
And watch it unwind
It's only what you're asking for
And you'll be just fine
With all of your time
It's only what you're waiting for
(I hope so).

/edit/

all the best for the exams everyone!
I cant wait for it to end.
anyway, dont forget to play song1 tmr for econs!

freaky freakfreak! =(

2008-05-05T21:57:00.008+08:00

listening to: everything you want - vertical horizon
(looking for the mp3 version to play in my green creative. ive got the itunes version only which doesnt help.)

Have been studying with zhongfen and bethia at tampines library.
we will be studying tog all the way all through exams.
Thanks girls.
I really needed that.
Studying with you guys made me feel like I'm not alone, that we're all in this together.
It motivates me to see you guys studying too and that I'm not doing it by myself.
Because studying by myself can be miserable, especially when I'm unable to get the answer right.
to be truthful, im really terrified of the exams.
the pressure is coming down hard on me, like the a levels did.
I need to overcome this.
so thanks girls!

as i study now, i'm so afraid i might forget the other subjects when i study for one, you know.
exams are on thursday.
EXAMS ARE STARTING ON THURSDAY, WHAT AM I GONNA DO?!
please please please let it be ok.
Please.

I hope I'm as brave as I seem to be.

/edit/
sleepless nights have set in.
I tossed and turned from 12 to 2am trying very hard to fall into peaceful sleep.
why am i so worried about things?
i think i need to chill big time after exams.

oh and my ex boss just turned into a father!
OMG!
i saw the pics on facebook!
time to go congratulate him...

2008-05-01T21:50:00.006+08:00

Listening to: worn me down - rachel yamagata

We celebrated my sister's birthday today
vivo city was chosen as the location
and we had no seafood signboard for lunch
and even though we were supposed to celebrate her birthday, she paid in the end.
but the food was awesome.
being a student means i'm deprived from good food because i dont have the finacial means to access it.
so naturally when i get to eat good food, i'm impressed.
anyway then we had coffee at this place called coudroy? i hope i didnt get the name wrong
its just beside gloria jean's coffees (another yummy place).
they had their coffees lah
i had a milkshake.
recently, i've fallen in love with cookies and cream and anything close to it.
so i ordered the oreo milkshake
one word.
delightful.
if i had an archie comic in hand as well, there would be the added effect of bliss.
but.
too bad all i had in hand were my sociology notes, which is depressing.
considering that by now, i still dont understand some things.
and i really need to increase my brain size.
I need about a million GB perhaps?
too many things to remember for exams.
I'm afraid that if i study a subject, i might forget things for the other subject.

Ferrari had a stimulator in vivo city just now and i took a go at it.
it was like driving on the road again.
although it cant measure up to actually really driving on the road, but oh well good enough.
someday, i will buy my own car.
i need to work towards it.
for now its public transport for me.

anyway, exams are really looming and i felt the weight of it press down on my chest this morning when i woke up.
i felt so worn down, so tired, so down.
i guess i already had other issues pressing down on me and exams just gave it the added effect.
go away you chest presser! (on second thoughts it does sounds wrong and a little weird!)
short post i have 99999999999999999999999999999 things to do bye!

_____________________________

Everything you want by vertical horizon
(let the music do the talking and feeling for you.)

Somewhere there's speaking
It's already coming in
Oh and it's rising at the back of your mind
You never could get it
Unless you were fed it
Now you're here and you don't know why

But under skinned knees and the skid marks
Past the places where you used to learn
You howl and listen
Listen and wait for the
Echoes of angels who won't return

He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why

You're waiting for someone
To put you together
You're waiting for someone to push you away
There's always another wound to discover
There's always something more you wish he'd say

But you'll just sit tight
And watch it unwind
It's only what you're asking for
And you'll be just fine
With all of your time
It's only what you're waiting for

Out of the island
Into the highway
Past the places where you might have turned
You never did notice
But you still hide away
The anger of angels who won't return

I am everything you want
I am everything you need
I am everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
I say all the right things
At exactly the right time
But I mean nothing to you and I don't know why
And I don't know why
Why
I don't know

2008-05-01T00:10:00.004+08:00

Listening to: Goodbye to you by michelle branch

Last lecture today.
exams are coming.
when lesson ended, i suddenly felt the stress of exams dawn upon me.
the reality of exams hit me right smack in the face.

Lecture today.
I think it got very fun when he mentioned the real world examples.
Suddenly, everything was familiar again.
Suddenly, I was transported back in time to my favourite class, GP.
Lydia Tan's class was always awesome.
She never failed to fill our brains with current affairs and information and new knowledge.
And thats what i really liked.
it was fun.
and then at the end of the lecture, he became so serious because it was the last lecture i think.
he was like, "you must do this this this. because the exams are very tough.. blah blah blah."
he became so fierce and then i was, wah.
the best part?
because all throughout the whole academic year, i've been constantly bombarding him with questions and today i gave him the last set of questions i had to clear some doubts (becos i hate going into the exam hall with doubts in my mind) and you knw what was the last thing he said to me?
he said something like, "I dont hope to see you again."
I think he meant, "Pass your paper."
But i think more likely he wanted to say, "Freak man, if all my students were like you, i'll die right now. Please DO NOT come to my class again. Teaching you is hard work, its the pits."

The weather has been so humid, it makes wearing clothes so unbearable.
It makes studying tough (unless in an air conditioned room) and i can barely sit still for 10 mins without wanting to tear my hair out due to the heat.

intelligence is a one of the features of people that draws me to them.
and after the ignorance for a long long time,
when u finally sit and have a decent conversation with someone and realise that they are much smarter than u imagined, u feel like u want to grab them (not literally) and make them your friend because u enjoy the conversation.
(it beats listening to endless music on my mp3 player)
But you cant because of circumstances.
and then u let it slip away.
but one is better than none.
i hate goodbyes.
i want to remove that word from my dictionary.
If i had a choice, i want to do it all over again.
The feeling was akin to the feeling i got on the last day of 7 and a half mths of work in sbs, when i had to clear my desk and say good bye to everybody.
life is full of goodbyes.
i wish i could lock down this post so that i didnt have to eliminate so many things.

anyway, i sold off 4 items today.
temporal bliss.
cheers!

happy birthday to zhongfen! =)
its already 12 plus am.

heres a pic since i havent put up pics in my blog for a long time.
taken in island creamery (ice cream after lunch) on monday, 28 april 2008.

2008-04-30T11:04:00.004+08:00

Its my sister's birthday today and its her first birthday in singapore in 4 years.

she's been overseas studying for the last 4 years and she's finally back.

lets go celebrate!

happy birthday sis!!!

2008-04-28T22:50:00.004+08:00

Listening to: Tattoo by Jordin Sparks, nice song.

Today the socio girls met up at madjack (sorry girls for being late!) for lunch.
Yes i was late because i realised that i had forgotten to bring out my handphone when i reached the bustop and my house is slightly far from the bustop.
so i ran home to grab my phone, in this terrible terrible heat.
anyway so we had lunch at madjack to celebrate zhongfen's birthday! (whoots!)
Food was nice.
i had a set lunch, the fish cream or something. nice nice!
there was a sign that was quite funny cause it said, "Caution, Fart Zone."
anyway, we had ice cream at island creamery which was nearby.
cookies and cream, delightful.

Lecture after that.
he may not be as funny as manfred ting.
but it wasnt boring or anything la.
i wrote non-stop (after the break) til my arm got so tired. cos he talked so fast.
and then here i was scribbling away barely less than half of what he said and barely even being able to read my own handwriting or spell words correctly cos i had to just write without thinking, i had to write, think of how to spell the word, process what he was saying and remember to write it down the following second.
Just like how u can hear alarms ringing in your ears after hearing a loud noise, i think my arm was feeling abit of the after effect when lecture ended too.
traffic was a total turn off on the way home.
anyw, so 1 more lesson and then exams.
arghhhh.

meeting zhongfen and bethia to study tomorrow in tamp library.
early start!
arghhhh. mug mug mug mug.

after exams, the socio girls are heading to the beach for our island getaway again!
i cannot wait to soak up the sun and fun.
this time, i wanna bring my air ball or whatever.
bin or khai bring the frisbee again!
i wanna playyyy!

oh i realised that alot of our bus drivers are very skilled drivers.
today i was sitting in 8 on the way to meet the girls (same route to school)
and i noticed that the driver needed to filter from the outter most lane to the inner most lane in order to turn.
and even though there were other agile and swift road bullies who would not give way (aka private cars) to the bus who was desperately trying to filter into the lane to take his route, the bus driver could skillfully and safely filter in and take his lane.
wow.
one of these days im going to rent a car for a spin just to ensure that i still remember what i learnt. =)
after the exams i guess...

//edit//
a friend lost
a friend found
a friend there
is
a friend forever
thank you for "shaking hands".
i feel so much better now i think.

2008-04-24T18:43:00.002+08:00

Listening to: grey sky morning by Vertical horizon
(I love this song).

Anna and I went to downtown east to study again.
Early again so at least it forces me to wake up and start mugging.
i slept last night at 2am. and woke up at about 7am plus to get ready to go out to mug.
anyw, we started studying at macdonalds (bless them for free flow of hot tea on cold and rainy morning like this) and then we had lunch at ehub's SUPERDOG.
hahaha. they have GREAT chilli cheese fries.
we stayed there to study and I cleared off alot of stuff.
=)
oh and they tested the indoor ferris wheel today.
when it officially starts running I'm going to go on it.
I have a love-hate relationship with ferris wheels.
Love because they are so so lovely and the ride is supposed to be enjoyable.
Hate because I am terribly afriad of heights and when the capsule starts shaking because of the dynamics of the turn of the wheel, i get frightened.
AHA.
still, i want to go on it and i know i'll probably end up very stiff and scared inside.
hahahaha. whatever lah.

anyw, i have to go collect my mock paper from sch tmr.
go all the way there just to collect my paper.
than come all the way back.

been getting giddy spells and headaches recently.
perhaps due to my sleeping patterns, pehaps due to lack of blood cells.
need to stock up on my vegs soon.
exams are coming, i need to take care of myself better.
i can say it here but i dont even know whether i really will remember to.
My focus now is my exams.

I cant wait for the holidays to begin.
No really REALLY, i cant wait.
studying everyday has gotten to me.
I'm really tired.
mentally and physically.
sister bought me archie comics last week to cheer me up.
now how cool is that?
even when she's busy with her work and her life and all, she still took that effort.
archie comics + cookies and cream ice cream = anti-stress agent

to all local uni friends: I know your exams are here. keep fighting on til the end. This war will be over soon, make it your best fight.
to all SIM-UOL friends: War is looming. Lets not tire out but instead, lets keep the driving spirit. All of us can do it. Don't give up. Stock up on amo and prepare for battle! =)

I need some motivation.

2008-04-22T18:57:00.007+08:00

Listening to: Empty - The click five
(The click five is coming to singapore! They play really great LIVE. so if u haven't yet heard them live u shld! I went to the black eyed peas concert, credits to my sister, and the click five opened for them. It was awe-freaking-some!)

I met anna today at downtown east to study.
I was supposed to meet her earlier but i waited for the bus for about slightly more than half an hour.
Finally when the bus came, 2 of it came together.
Murphy's Law.
Please lah even the most un-frequent bus came like twice.
anyw, at downtown east we discovered that the new buidling, the ehub, has a indoor ferris wheel (coolios) and (drums roll..................................) SUPERDOG!
There's only one outlet at vivo and now there's one at downtown east.
double and triple whoots.
HAHA.
oh and i had 3 huge cups of tea.
again.

anyw, its about 2 wks to war.
bring out your amo and mark down 08may on your calendars.
its time to stock up and brace ourselves for the ultimate.
aka exams.
Crap.

Tmr's the JP Morgan Chase Challenge thing.
So apparently the road along esplanade and raffles place will be closed.
so people intending to go there, take note.
it will be closed for a few hours only.
probably 3pm - 6pm i think? i cant really remember.
I will be there with my cca people helping out.

I have to pop by school this friday to collect my last mock paper which is very troublesome.
but i think i'll just get some studying done there since i have to go there anyway.
maybe study over at NP since the tables in school are always always all occupied.

A wisdom tooth is ripping the daylights out of my gum at the back.
like OW can?
Its just wisdom tooth but its very @#$^&()*^$@#@%^$&
oh well..

ok i have to rush off now.
9999999999999999999999999 things to do.
bye!

//edit//
read some of my own archive files.
back to when i blogged when i was only in secondary 3.
on and on, all the endless gramatically unsound languge flooded posts.
how utterly embarrassing.
I cannot believe that even I went through that stage.
and now i begin to wonder how i got my A2 for english for o levels and my B3 for General paper.
holy crap.

2008-04-17T20:47:00.003+08:00

Listening to: coldplay songs =)

I start my post today by saying how econs has let me down.
I didnt do as expected which made me upset.
and apparently my script doesnt have a single red pen mark on it.
It only has my answers and final marks on the cover page.
So I dont exactly know where i went wrong.
But looking at the answers from the UK lecturer, i sort of know where i went wrong i think.

all my UK revision lectures have ended!
Finally! The 6 hr lectures have come to an end.
Its been very very tedious.

its 3 weeks to the impending war (exams).
I've not gotten my exam timetable from RELC yet but i have seen the online version.

I had about 5 cups of tea today and i still fell asleep on the bus.
I do hope the caffeine does not kick in later again.
Because then my problem of not being able to sleep early would not be solved.
I'm supposed to be awake during the day, not at night or early morning.
No matter how i try to tell the cup of tea, it doesn't listen.
That's huilinglin's cup of tea for you.
and my POA friends have been calling me huilinglin ever since we exchanged emails!

Today during lunch it was a such a laugh.
the 4 of us were having lunch at the canteen and then a friend wanted to buy bubble tea.
So she asked what we all wanted and we started placing our orders with her.
And then one of them said, "I want mineral water."
and the reply came from my other friend (without much thought i think), "U want pearls?"
and then everyone gave her a puzzled look and she realised.
It was quite funny la.
And then, we were just joking and laughing and one of my friend yelled "POA" again!

and yes, as u can probably deduce by now, i love school.
except for the impending exams.
i hate how i can no longer do past year papers and score on my stupid exams.
because uol wil never cease to amaze me with their never ending new sets and kinds of questions.
CAN I USE MY JEDI MIND TRICK OR DISPLAY MY KUNGFU MOVES PLEASE?

yeah right.
i better get back to the books soon.

lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and I will try
to fix you

2008-04-15T10:27:00.006+08:00

Listening to: Yellow By Coldplay

Okay okay enough of stupid emo posts.
sometimes i dont really have time to write about anything so i write about stuff that I might want to remember the next time i read my own blog in the future or something you know.
Anyway, so here's an update post.

Well, nothing's been up recently.
There's just exams coming.
~~Im still struggling with POA. I'm unable to do up a cashflow when given 2 Balance sheets and 2 P&Ls, help please!~~ Solved! In the end, its just that the answers were printed wrongly. LOL.
Although i can do the one with 2 Balance sheets or 2 balance sheets and 1 P&L.
I've been dwelling on it ever since i could not solve it and even in my sleep i dream about doing POA questions and thats why when i wake up, my brain is so tired its like as if i've not slept a wink.
This is ridiculous, i know.
How in the world can someone do POA in her sleep?
But if you're huilinglin, trust me, u can.

and its bad enough that I'm unable to sleep at night.
I'm always wide awake at 1am.
and I have no idea why sometimes.
Its not like I'm seriously troubled or anything.
I'm rather happy being a student even though i shudder at the word, "Exams".
(speaking of which, i told my friend that day that I shudder at the word "POA" and she immediately yelled the word "POA" and stopped to look at my reaction and we all laughed. HAHAHA.)
Anyway, so I dont see why I cant get to sleep.
and then i remembered one episode i once watched on The OC.
In this episode, Marrissa has died and her killer has already been caught and nothing else is happening. Ryan is unable to sleep at night from then on, not because he is troubled or anything but because he did not have the motivation to sleep because there was nothing in his life to look forward to the next day.
Oh well, just saying because i just remembered.

anyway, on to my week.
I'm going to woodlands to meet a friend later because she asked for help with something and I do hope i will be able to help her. I will do my best =)
We wanted to meet in sch because she lives in CCK and i live in tamp.
And then i thought woodlands will be better since i have a bus there anyw, 168.
anyw, so tmr meeting amanda.
(HAHAHAHA. sorry la dont play word games with me in sms, i cannot comprehend.)
This week there's class on thursday, my last UOL rev class.
I'm left with 2 more classes but they're both Local rev classes and they're both socio which falls on the last wk of april.
looks like thats what ive planned for my week so far.

alright, 999999999 things left to do.
so tata!

2008-04-14T11:52:00.006+08:00

I had a hard time searching for this lyrics but i found it anyway.
I love this song because its so meaningful.
Its funny how people say when i speak chinese it sounds like english all over again.
yet i listen to chinese songs..hmmm...

never the less, this is a great great song.
and its one of those songs i listen to at night on my green creative just before i go to sleep.
I am in conversation with it as well because just like the coldplay song, this song holds plenty of meaning for me.
It knows how to speak of things I dont generally speak of.

Enjoy.

因为 - 范玮琪

总在我家巷口和你分手仿佛偶像剧一样
觉得我们就要发生些什么
总在回家时候不知所措想再打电话给你
可是再见刚刚才说过

有一种想要拥抱你的冲动想静静看着你的笑容
让你藏在怀中直到我每天的尽头

因为想一个人而寂寞因为爱一个人而温柔
因为有一个梦而执着因为等一个人而折磨
因为想一个人而解脱因为爱一个人而宽容
因为有一个梦而放纵因为等一个人而漂泊

因为想一个人而寂寞因为爱一个人而温柔
像夜的蒙眬你的深情难懂我的世界因为你而不同

因为想一个人而解脱因为爱一个人而宽容
像风的自由你的深情难留你的背影是我最美丽的所有

2008-04-11T23:14:00.003+08:00

I'm really tired.
and I have no mood to do anything.
perhaps its better also that this happened, not that i enjoyed the travelling but im not angry or anything la.
My eyes are tired, but my brain is wide awake.
how do we reconcile that?

I wish you would but dont and will never.
but still and always will.
these 2 sentences speak of 2 different things at the same time.
how weird is that?

the song below speaks plenty.
it talks to me and we are in conversation every single time it plays in my green creative.
Thats because it writes these things out in a song, things that i don't always speak of.
Thank you coldplay, you just brought me to tears.

and i will try to fix you...

2008-04-11T09:47:00.000+08:00

Fix You By Coldplay

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

When the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

High up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
If you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I...

Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I...

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

2008-04-08T23:38:00.003+08:00

Listening to: All you wanted by Michelle branch (these days im too lazy to include the imeem player in my posts, u can alw hear it on my playlist at the right hand column.)

Firstly, JP Morgan Chase Challenge anyone?
anyone joining it?
anyway the registrations are still open.
Apparently my cca is volunteering and I'm one of them volunteering for the run.
I'm under the clothes volunteering section so i think i need to give out shirts or something.
anyway, heard it'll be fun so for those of you going, see u guys there.

these few days have been spent with my green hot bottle or whatever u call it.
you supposed to put hot water into it and it will become like a big hot warmer.
Its kinda like flat and rectangular-ish.
anyway its for my tummy.
My stomach has defintely seen better days.
But its been very moody recently and giving me a hard time.
Its been occuring everyday.
I havent been eating well too, perhaps its the cause of it.
wait a min, no no.
i havent been eating well because of the tummy pains.
sounds like the chicken and egg thing, which caused what.

been watching scrubs and its hilarious.
u shld watch it too, so awesome.

some things are meant and better to be said in person.
i still cant get it out of my head.
stupid stupid thing.
if i had the choice, i will choose the option of that available in eternal sunshine of the spotless mind.
arghh, talk about reality.

im going to tough this pain out.
or these pains out rather.
whatever.
goodnight world.

2008-04-06T23:32:00.001+08:00

Listening to: How to save a life - The fray

It has been a crazy and mad week.
First, I mistook stats lesson for thurs instead of wed.
and then i only found out when pc asked me why i was online the entire day.
i wanted to say no school but when i clicked on my own timetable, to my horror and shock, i realised that i missed my uol rev stats workshop, the one and only.
i was upset becos i couldnt do pretty much the entire section b of the stupid paper and i really wanted to know how to do it.
anyway, its been days now and i've heard things about it, tsk tsk.
the answers will be up on the portal soon so i guess no worries about that now.
I am such a nerd.

And then my horrible weekend classes began.
It started on friday, with maths1 local rev class first.
My Scottish Lecturer was wearing his tradition costume (matching tartan skirt and tie!) with the high socks and all because it was the UOL graduation ceremony day.
and everyone just wanted to take pictures with him, everyone!
anyway then after that it was econs in full gear all the way til today.
The local classes were fine.
The UOL rev one was nerve wrecking.
Our self esteem took a very bad beating. Ouch.
But none the less, i learnt plenty from it.
And it is clear to me that both LSE and UOL hope that we would be able to use our knowledge and apply it to the dynamics surrounding the world, or for this matter, the global economy.
I guess school is really beyond the paper.
This is so unlike JC or secondary school.

Going to school on a weekend is tough.
Its depressing becos its supposedly quieter.
the roads and even school is quieter.
Still, I cant get seats on the train.
But i have to admit that its a much faster mode of transportation.

It makes alot of difference having lecture alone and having it with friends.
Alot of my UOL rev lessons were spent alone (but thank goodness i made some new friends).
Thank Goodness i had econs lect with the socio girls.
Hopefully, i'll be able to take the same lessons as them next yr (altho they will be taking POA and i will be taking the dreadful IBM alone).

I had alot more to say but i think i'll do it tmr morning becos im really tired and i have to do other things.

ps: anyone taking part in the JP Morgan chase challenge? see u there. more details in next post.

2008-04-02T10:27:00.008+08:00

Listening to: The Great Escape by Boys like Girls

I discovered this song last night while i was trying to fall asleep.
Apparently I have a problem of falling asleep recently.
So I switched on my radio and listened to muttons at midnight!
it was so hilarious ok!
i still remember how i wouold listen to muttons in the morning back when i was still working and i would laugh to myself on the bus.
so retarded right...
i know.
anyway, so then instead of my usual archie comic, i picked up my globalization book and tried to read but to no avail because my mind kep wandeing off and thinking of something else.
i finally fell asleep at 1:15am.

Yesterday was april fool's day.
and i played this trick on alot of pple in my phonebook.
hahahaha.
sorry guys for the minor heart attack.
the replies that came back were like, "ling, you're so evil ok!" or like, "Omg huiling lah you. what in the world, so lame!"
But anyway, aren't u glad to know that im not angry at all?
i think the funniest reactions were from manda and engtian.
haha, really funny man.
then Tien-Yao tried to double april fool's me but i was smart enough!
haha.

Ongoing lectures.
I've made a group of new friends once again.
I'll be having econs lecture with them on friday, sat and sunday.
Yesterday I was late for socio lecture and so i had to sit infront because the lect hall was so full.
And Steve Taylor kept shoving the mike in my face at odd times.
anyway, yesterday's lecture was fun.
and unlike Gosling's one which scared me so much, his was lighthearted and i felt like i could conquer the world after the lect ended.
and of cos, once again, i've learnt new things, things that were never taught in the local lectures.
anyway, today's my off day.
lectures resume tmr all the way until sunday.
breathe...

it makes me so mad to think that when i try to make things easier for others,
they turn around and try to make things easier for me.
i do not argue that they are being nice.
but at the expense of themselves?
that makes me so mad.
like, why cant u just act the way u shld, u know?
why must u always have ur way?
i know that having ur way means its better for me but at the expense of yourself.
but dont u get it?
thats the whole point.
for once, its supposed to be fair play.
or for me to be like, hey look u've been so nice all these time let me be the nice person for once u know?
omg this makes me soooooo mad and frustrated.
sorry have to vent here.
and its quite safe here cos i dont think it will be read.

on a lighter note,
i got back my stats1 mock paper and i was literally shaking when i was going to collect my paper.
there was a long long queue and then i heard these, "omg what did you get?" "22. failed. aiyah expected la."
i heard alot of 40s and i was like praying silently, "God please let me at least pass. It was a super hard paper. But God, please let me pass..."
The stats1 paper was seriously a really tough paper.
i thought that it was the toughest paper in the whole mock exams, ok wait, maybe 2nd toughest cos POA was the toughest.
and so when my turn came to collect my paper, i produced my IC and they immed started going through the pile to look for my paper and i suddenly got so nervous.
I know some of u think, its only the mock, who cares, blah blah blah.
But i take every single test and exam seriously and if i dont do well for one paper, i will question myself and ask where i've gone wrong.
i will do everything in my ability to make sure i correct my mistake and know how to do it right the next time.
thats just me.
so then they retrieved my paper and the woman who saw my paper looked at the bottom of the page (where my marks were) and frowned.
she then passed it to me.
I grabbed it and closed my eyes for a while and told myself, "This is it. Whatever it is, just accept it and learn from your mistakes. Afterall, it was a really hard paper and theres alot you don't know so just learn."
I slowly opened up my booklet and saw my name and my handwriting.
So it was definitely my booklet.
Then my eyes darted towards the marks and i immediately wanted to cry.
but tears of joy.
because right there at the end of the page was my marks.
and it said
62.
(second upper)

//edit:
the day has gotten from 10 to -50.
thanks to the fact that i stupidly threw the ball into someone else's court and now i cant get it back and it makes me so maddddddd.
also for the fact that my mobile billing has problems.
and i need to go down personally to settle them.
and this frying pan weather isnt helping as well.
Im switching to a starhub student plan this coming end may and will be giving my mum my current number.
any comments on this, please comment away!
=)

2008-03-30T18:51:00.005+08:00

Listening to: Shadow of the day by Linkin Park

I close both locks below the window.
I close both blinds and turn away.
Sometimes solutions aren't so simple.
Sometimes goodbye's the only way.

And the sun will set for you,
The sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.

Pink cards and flowers on your window,
Your friends all plead for you to stay.
Sometimes beginnings aren't so simple.
Sometimes goodbye's the only way.

And the sun will set for you,
The sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.

And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.

[Guitar solo]

And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.

____________________________________

8 cups of coffee and tea in a day isnt enough.
last friday i still fell asleep at the study bench while trying to understand some econs concepts.
I remembered blinking alot before falling asleep and the next thing i knew when i woke up, it was 30mins later.
but even in my sleep, i was dreaming about exams.
freaky.
see if i have 24 hours a day, then this is probably how i spend my day if i have a lecture (rough estimate).
Brush teeth/bathe/wash up - 1.5hrs
Eating meals 1.5hrs
Lecture - 6hrs
Travelling time - 3.5hrs
Total - 12.5 hrs
that leaves me another 11.5 hrs to have time to myself, sleep or study or do whatevers.
if only we had more than 24 hrs a day.

I have no more morning classes and I am very happy about it!
Although i will still be caught in the evening rush hour because classes end at that timing.
but at least i'm heading home.
I cannot deal with the amount of stress that rises when you are still on the highway for goodness knows how long and you're worried because lectures are about to begin or have begun.
but anyway i left 5mins earlier this week and it made a 35min difference because i wasnt caught in the highway jam.
what a whole lot of difference man.
still, maybe taking the train would be better but getting a seat would be impossible.
I bet that kan chiong working adults will push me away again just to get a seat.
poor old me who is heading towards DOVER/CLEMENTI when you are what, only heading to CITYHALL/RAFFLES PLACE can.
and i'm not being an ass here by generalizing.
it actually happened.
A guy wearing black pants, striped shirt (i actually think that guys who wear stiped shirts look nice ok!) and carrying a brief case sort of nudged me away with alot of force when i was almost going towards the empty he seat.
he then hurriedly took the seat while i was recovering from the shock.
i think he was guilty so he closed his eyes to make it look like he was sleeping.
he then got off at Raffles place.
And i thought adults were mature.
tsk tsk.

Oh i met amanda on friday for dinner.
im starting to learn to try to make time for my friends too because its these people that have helped me through in my life here and there and i'm grateful for these friends.
anyway, it was fun meeting her.
we had pasta mania at tampines then we walked around for abit before we headed home because we got to tampines very late after classes.
we were talking about school and all.
and im glad we take degrees that are in the same field so when i tell her all the shit i encounter she sort of knows la.
hahahaha.
anyway, meet again soon ya! =)

next week is gonna be quite hectic.
i have lessons from tues - sun (excluding wed).
All the lectures are 6 hr ones except for friday.
i have a 3 hr lecture and then a half hr break followed by a 4 hr lecture after that (supposed to be 3 hrs, but manfred ting extended it because he felt it might help us).
the good thing about manfred ting is that he actually bothers about our welfare and would actually extend out lecture if needed, unlike other lecturers who would prefer to cut back on lectures.
anyway, dreading the sat and sun lectures because its so depressing!
10am - 5pm, same subject for 6 hrs.
I hope i can hold out.

watching alot of smallvile recently.
nice.

oh well.
ok i dont have much left to say other than I'M REALLY REALLY VERY TIRED AND I NEED MORE HOURS AND MORE TEA AND COFFEE (although tea is preferred over coffee because i think most coffees are very smelly. hahaha.)

2008-03-25T10:01:00.006+08:00

I cant really remember the last time ive totally lost my appetite to eat.
even though i've not even been eating much lately and have lost alot of weight.

I cant really remember the last time ive been so distracted in my lecture, with something bugging me heavily as i struggle to concentrate on the lecture and put my problems aside.

I cant really remember the last time i went to sleep with a heavy problem in my head and then waking up and thinking about it first thing in the morning.

I cant really remember the last time i had something like this bug me all day and i feel like as if im carrying this heavy load on my back alone, feeling so lost and alone.

I cant really remember the last time ive actually told someone how i felt and stood up for my feelings, be it anger or hurt or whatever it is.
Although I generally just shut up about them and let it pass becos i know whatever i say always comes out in another way.
and true enough, fate never fails to repeat history.
and even on different grounds.
so what was the point of me saying anything again?

I cant really remember the last time i had such a freaking load on me so close to exams.

I need a break from all this.
I am going mad thinking about it.

still with a very heavy heart and head i stive on.

if only life was like enchanted.
yeah right, YOU WISH.

what can you believe
who can you believe
how can you believe

what can i know
how can i know

Maybe, i choose none.
maybe i will choose to ignore everyone talking at me and shut the world out.
let them say, scream, yell and shout at me.
maybe i decided to shut everyone out of this matter and move on with my freaking life.
i dont care whats wrong or whats right anymore, maybe i choose none and maybe i just want to get past this.
and thats what i probably decided while i was asleep and dreaming.

2008-03-23T18:16:00.003+08:00

Listening to: built to last by meelee

Revision classes have begun.
apparently, last week wasnt the end of the morning horror classes.
I have 2 next week i think.
thinking if it gives me the shivers.
i do not want to get myself caught between kan chiong students and frantic woking adults again.
no, no more.

The UOL revision classes began on friday.
i didnt really know what to expect.
6 hours of nothing but math on a publicly declared holiday.
in a lecture theatre with a very jet-lagged lse math professor.
He went on with cup after cup of coffee.
but anyway, depressing.
everyone was out having fun i think.
and by the time my lecture ended, i was so zombified.
i took the train back and stoned all the way back.

But having said that, no matter how much i may complain on and on about school, I do realyl enjoy studying and schooling.
Its something that i hope will never end, but nothing is indefinite.

Havent gotten much sleep recently.
but i have been chilling more than i did for a levels which makes me feel guilty all over again.

People keep reminding me that im going to be 20 soon and i'm like, "Chill man. i just turned 19. let me enjoy my youth please."

ok gtg now.
lots ot do.
bye.

2008-03-17T11:57:00.003+08:00

Listening to : Nobody;s home by Avril Lavigne

I honesttly think that is Avril's last good album.
anyway, hello folks.
i begin by telling you how entirely angry i was this morning.
i absolutely hate morning lessons if u asked me.
I would never ever choose morning classes if i had a choice.
But anyway, squeezing with school kids and working adults?
not my cup of tea. and definitely not something i would ask for considering that i only had about 4 hours of sleep last night.
I ended up taking the 7am bus and yes, i was late again.
even though 8 zoomed past so many bustops because nobody alighted so nobody could board because it was packed.(thank Goodness i live where i live because that was the last bustop that 8 could accomodate people).
There were alot of springfield students.
And for the love of my ears and my utter peace and silence, i would appreciate it plenty if i could keep it at status quo.
There was a student who sat beside me and blasted the speakers of his handphone with the sounds of Fort Minor and Linkin park.
Its not that I dont fancy any of their songs, infact i do like some of their songs but just not at 7am in the morning when i am clearly half awake and wld appreciate my own space.
Besides, there is the invention called the headphones or earpiece.
seriously, i could hear it even through my earpiece which was playing "How to save a life".
I was glad when the students alighted.
Im pretty sure that I was never like that, infact, i didnt really even have a handphone til i forgot how old. and okay even if i did, it was barely a nokia 8250.
and even then, i did not blast my handphone with loud music at such an (i was going to say ungodly hour but its isnt so nice right and its rude to God) early hour of the day.

I cant rem but i think this is one of the few or maybe even the only morning class i have left.
whoots.
I dont like having to rush with people.
I HAVE FULL DAY MATHS LESSON ON GOOD FRIDAY AND I AM SO ANRGYYYYYYYYY.
MATHS THE ENTIRE DAY! HOLY CRAP...

im feeling alot of things these days because alot has happened which is like so !@#$%$#@$%^&&!@@#$%^^#! (yes, very expressive).
hai yah but thats life huh.
but never mind.
right now i am feeling really hungry and so i shall go n eat.
i didnt even have my breakfast.
ok bye!

2008-03-12T16:26:00.003+08:00

Listening to: A lack of colour - The OC Soundtrack

Its been raining these couple of days and its so gloomy and dull.
I hate it when it rains non stop, and i dont feel like going out at all.
Hence i have been slacking these entire 2 days.
The rain is so depressing.

Went baby shopping (or whatever you call it) just the other day for my grand nephew.
saying it makes me sound so old.
anyway, so i was really clueless.
on the sizes and all.
and i think after the whole debarcle, i was seeing stars.
and possibly a moon and a planet.
yeah, i have no idea how i'll ever be a parent next time.
okay, do not think about it yet.
infact, im pretty content being a student.

ok i dont know what else to say already so bye!

__________edit___________________

i jus remembered.
i went for the IT show at suntec on sunday after church.
the crowd was crazy.
but anyw, i bought a digi camera. okay or more like i chose it and mummy paid.
8.2 megapixels and an antishake camera.
they gave free stuff like 2 gb SD card, card reader, tripod stand, camera stand, rechargeable batteries, etc...
$169.
and now i can use it to tk pics when im out (outings or foodies!) or for my online shop.
whoooots. =)

2008-03-08T17:35:00.012+08:00

Okay I have a few things to blog about.

Firstly,
SSA came back positive and im really excited even though ive only received the email reply.
They are sending the snail mail reply very very soon with everything intact and WHOOTS OMG IT CAME BACK POSITIVE!
hahahaha. yeah im so freaking happy but most credits go to my sister who is financing it for now.
Ive been planning in my head this and that and having said that, once i receive the package, i will need to sort out plenty of things and start planning.

Exams are ending, my last paper on monday, POA.
I really really despise that unit utterly and its turning my brains into mashed mushu seriously.
It is annoying to have to remember pages and pages of never ending formulas and formats.
I took the A levels once and Im never ever going near it again, much less want to take something similar to it, why cant the creeping creeper of a creepy creep just leave me alone?
Anyhow, the prelims ending does make me feel relief in a way because i feel suffocated whenever I am having the exams.
But having said that, it also means that the finals are drawing near.
thats life, suck it up and live with it (as my sis would say).
Oh and Im so happy for my sis who has been appearing again and again in the papers for the scholars advert recently.

During the Prelims, I had to take the bus in the morning.
I've almost forgotten about the morning rush but its a good thing i didnt have to meet school kids because I leave much later than that.
still, i've almost forgotten how utterly packed the bus can be and i was slightly horrified by it initially HAHAHA. U shld have seen my face.

I think that when exams end, Im going to chill here and there but also buck up during intensive studies.
yup.
Meetup people! =)
Crap, Im really bad at this and this is def one area i need to improve on.
Uni friends: Meetup inbtw mid terms and finals =)
Socio girls: Meetup to hang out and/or study! [Bethia want to hit the beach again right? hahahaha.]
other friends: HAHAHAA. i think i havent seen u guys for the longest time ever so sorry! but I am still trying hard to arrange pple here and there except that i always dont get definite answers and then in end when the definite answers come its always too late cos something else crops up..

Been sleeping at 3am everyday recently.
its not healthy but alot of times i just cant get to sleep.
Altho sometimes i collapse from exhaustion slightly earlier than 3am.
Anyhow its not healthy.
I do wake at 9am almost everyday, except for today, perhaps because of the the fatigue or weather?
I lost quite abit of weight recently too.
Its not healthy as well. I suspect its linked to the fact that I sleep late although goodness knows how.
But I will try to gain it back and i have been eating normally for about one a half weeks already.
so as to how i didnt gain back the weight, its beyond me.
And speaking of eating, i went grocery shopping for my mum that day and i bought a pack of famous amos cookies.
After having discovered famous amos cookies years back, I have been biased against the other type of cookies.
Preconceived notion.

On a lighter note, both my handphone and mp3 player has been fixed which is great really.
I dont like to have exams and then have to worry about such minor issues, too irritating.

And on a random note,
I saw or found something online and sad to say, much as I dont have anything against it, and much as it is portrayed to be the other party's fault, I cant help but think that somehow it ended because you never changed.
I cant help but think that once again, even being 4 years older now, you're still the same.
You never grew up and you never learnt.
And yes, admittedly its quite obvious that its not your fault but i think and i dare say that i know you jumped on this chance to relief yourself of commitments.
and for this, the person I had thought u to be is still the same.
If i ever walked along the streets and saw you, I will not bother to even say hi to you.
Infact I wont even walk by blindly, I would even try to avoid you.
Thank Goodness you didnt ruin my youth.
I HOPE YOU SEE THIS.
I know this sounds very mean to a reader of this blog
But if you knew what i was talking about, you would agree with me too.
(Amanda Im refering to Barney).

Oh yeah and ive meant to blog about this for a while cos its so freaking funny but i had to ask my sis for her permission first.
My sis is a lizard killer.
No, seriously.
Just the other day we found a dead lizard that was trapped between 2 sliding windows.
Poor guy! he probably died when my sis was in hurry and closed her windows in a hurry.
And this isnt the first time!
When my sis was back for her summer holiday once, she once closed a window shut on a lizard. She also once shut the door on a lizard.
Lastly, back at our old house, she once suffocated a lizard with a pile of clothes unknowingly.
Thinking about it always makes me laugh all over again because its so freaking funny...
So you dont really need a pest buster to get rid of lizards, u only need my sister to be there.
=)

2008-03-07T22:22:00.001+08:00

My sister is in today's straits times
scholarship section page 5
hahahaahah.

2008-03-06T12:29:00.004+08:00

I have so much pent up anger in me, i have to blog about it.

I totally screwed up my organisations essay and abit of my globalisation essay, 25 marks each.
for globalisation, i forgot to say a few of the examples i had on hand.
and for organisation, i blanked out for it.
I have no idea why i cant remember anything for it at all.
Perhaps also becos the socio lecturer sort of rushed through it, or at least i felt he rushed it.
and thinking that he wants us to only go for one of the 2 local revision lectures makes me so mad.
why cant he just take the freaking time to go through additional essays on globalisation and organisation for everyone?
come on man, 3 whole hours, alot can be learnt.
When I saw the org question in the socio paper i had no idea where to even begin.
I think i wrote alot of crap as well.
why? all due to the fact that we dont have enough practice.
and it makes me really really mad.

Statistics paper was also a whole lot of crap.
I took like dont know how to long to think and ended up having insufficient time to write my answers down.
It was so tough I barely even knew what to write.
I mean, sure, I made a few mistakes while doing past year papers.
but WTH this paper is totally _______________________________. (Censored)
I didnt even finish the paper. I think i left like a 15 mark question blank and a few other questions also, didnt know what to write or no time to do so.
Tearing up the paper first came to mind the moment they collected the scripts.
but rationally, i have to redo the paper on my own and see what I can do and what I cant.
(i realised i chose the wrong question to do, shld have done the other one for the section where we can choose)
Then i wld have to check with the answers so that i can learn from my mistake.

SIGH.
POA on monday
and i have cant even rem a single formular from the chapter that has 6 pages full of formulas, ratio analysis or something?
if the POA paper is gonna be as _______________ as the PSOC and Stats one, im going to _________________.

No im just kidding...
Im going to have to work harder lah.
=(((
ok gotta go off now and eat my lunch. (My stomach was grumbling throughout the entire exam and even before it started. so embarrassing)
only came here to blog.
didnt even sign into gmail or msn.
nobody sending me anything/file anyw.
BYE.

*************** If this post is rather incomprehensive, pls ignore it then. sorry that this post is like a 'complete the blanks' post.

ps: SSA CAME BACK POSITIVE!! omgggggggg. CREDITS TO MY SISTER.

2008-03-04T19:41:00.004+08:00

one song for today

hear me cry by cagnet
(i think the name in the imeem box is her japanese name? cos she is japanese if im not wrong?)

You couldn't say
needed someone new
You actually thought
deep inside I knew
Can you tell me How can you say
Why this should suffice
You passed me by
and your heart as cold as ice
(You passed me by)
Did you see me cry
(Did you ask yourself why)
Did you see me cry
(Did you ask yourself how)
Can you hear me cry
(Did you ask yourself)
Will we ever grow apart
You, you couldn't say
needed someone new
and you actually thought
deep inside I knew
I wonder where we will go
Will we be the same
(You passed me by)
I laugh inside I think of you
and the love we made
(You passed me by)
Tell me why this should suffice
I hold you through the night
Now will I let it go
Soon I'll let it go
Can you hear me cry
(Will you ask yourself why)
Can you hear me cry
(Will you ask yourself how)
Can you hear me cry
(Will you ask yourself)
Will we ever grow apart
You, I'll stand by your side
I'll be there for you
(You passed me by)
You, I'll stand by your side
Please just do me right
(You passed me by)
You, I'll stand by your side
I'll be there for you
Hear Me Cry

ps: My handphone is home =)

2008-03-01T19:06:00.005+08:00

listening to: sleeping with the light on by busted.
sad song.

short post..

met anna yesterday to study.
havent seen her for so long man.
i shld really improve on making more effort in asking friends out and catching up with them.
so sorry guys! =)
ok yes i know must improve my time management.

met the lovelies of 05S35 today.
haha, okay yeah got guys also and we shldnt be calling guys lovelies.
anyw, we had lunch and chatted and caught up.
havent seen everyone for so long now.
and we were saying how we were gonna be 20 this year and we're still acting like how we did in jc.
anyw, and whats wrong with girls passing driving class c first time round?
OEY we may be girls, but we're STRONG.
=)
oh and everyone's talking about the JI Guy. yup.

Im freaking tired cos i havent been able to sleep recently.
yup.

ok 1 and a half papers down.
2 and a half more to go.
whoots.
aiyah, also not the actual exam.

ok super random but bye!

2008-02-28T01:15:00.004+08:00

330 am last night/this morning.
im so freaking tired now
almost 3am every single day.

__________edited at 724pn, 29 feb______

its 3 am and im still wide awake...
why?
__________edited at 3am, 28 feb_________

Listening to: Tattoo By Jordin Sparks

No matter what you say about love
I keep coming back for more
Keep my hand in the fire
Sooner or later, I'll get what I'm asking for

No matter what you say about life
I learn every time I bleed
That truth is a stranger
Soul is in danger, I gotta let my spirit be free

To admit that I'm wrong
And then change my mind
Sorry but I have to move on
And leave you behind

[Chorus]
I can't waste time so give it a moment
I realize, nothing's broken
No need to worry 'bout everything I've done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don't look back at a new direction
I loved you once, needed protection
You're still a part of everything I do
You're on my heart just like a tattoo

(Just like a tattoo, I'll always have you
I'll always have you, I'll always have you)

I'm sick of playing all of these games
It's not about taking sides
When I looked in the mirror, didn't deliver
It hurt enough to think that I could

Stop, admit that I'm wrong
And then change my mind
Sorry but I gotta be strong
And leave you behind

[Chorus]

(Just like a tattoo, I'll always have you
I'll always have you)

[Bridge]
If I live every moment
Won't change any moment
Still a part of me and you
I will never regret you
Still the memory of you
Marks everything i do

[Chorus X2]

Just like a tattoo
I'll always have you

(i cant believe how much this song says....how does it do it?)

__________________________________________________________________

Its very frustrating that my mp3 player keeps hanging and apparently i cant add files to it now.
have to bring it down to get it fixed soon...
my handphone is still being repaired which is also very frustrating.

oh my driving license came today but i wasnt at home.
so i have to go to the postoffice to collect it tmr.
i accidentally tore up and threw away the slip they left me so i have some explaining to do at the post office tmr.

in the meantime, the next few exams are gonna be almost back to back.
i did sociology the entire day yesterday and today
and i have so far only completed chapter 1 - one fifth of chapter 4.
i now understand why i have a love-hate rel with sociology.
becos as interesting it is to learn about theories and what not, the exams are so difficult!
and then i still have stats and POA, which i really know almost nothing about.

on a lighter note, i have been eating better recently.
but sleep is still lacking.
i shld do smth about it becos i feel tired sometimes, altho my body is adjusting to the min hours i clock.
and i feel like doing something fun after the exams.
feel so restricted and depressed from the daily library trips.

13 years have passed.
today, i am 13 years older from the time it happened.
I may not still be in my school polka dotted skirt and white uniform explaining to my form teacher why i did not turn up for school for the past few days without an mc and also without doing my homework, why i spent the few days MIA from school.
and still, 13 years later i can still remember the scene or scenes very clearly.
and today, im proud to say that the new head is my ultimate hero/heroine.

dont ask...

2008-02-24T20:40:00.009+08:00

Listening to:
out of reach by Gabrielle

First of all, prelims have began.
one paper down and four more to go.
thank goodness the worst paper will be the last paper altho frankly, all papers are really tough.
when i first opened the econs paper on saturday, i went "OH CRAP".
but of cos i didnt say it out loud la.
i just sort of said it in my head.

anyway, my handphone has been sent for repairs and im using a super crap phone.
dont call, dont mss becos this phone is crap.
it cant receive calls becos it will suddenly switch off and it is generally what i would call, a "lao pok" phone. =)
i really hope to get my nokia back soon!
yeah its also quite an old model lah.
but i dont care, i really like it.

and just the other day i was going to play my guitar (one of my daily routines)
but one of the strings has given way!
~~so, i have to go down to yamaha one day to purchase strings to restring them.~~ (Gone down, they dont have the ball bearing strings there, anyone going to PS? help me get the ones there!)
in the meantime, its a good thing i have a smaller guitar at home, one of my prized possessions.
so i practice on it for now for the time being.

Its study week for the local univerisities and my schedule is jammed packed this week.
in any case its all library anyway.
we all have to study for exams.
nvm, when exams r over and the summer break starts I am so gonna do something fun.
study now first...
i sent out SSA
and im waiting for a positive reply.
(pls dont ask what it is, my close friends know what it is.)
i think i might get a part time job during the summer hols in btw SSA.
yup.

Tampines library is now my second home.
i say that for 2 reasons.
1. im there almost all the time now
2. like at home, i dress like crap when i go there to study. i dont really care to do my hair and i just thrown on stuff to wear without thinking whenever i study there.
so please ignore me when im there, dont have to be appalled at the lack of fashion sense when im there.
i am after all there to study and not look like some model pls.

and, my home and table looked like a bomb had hit it.
paper, pens, pencils and all sorts of notes r lying everywhere.
this is war!
also, i think my mum is gonna kill me. =XX

if u had 2 kid cousins that you love and one hurt the other one (the one u care for more even tho u love them both) will do u some thing about it to protect the one u care for more or sit back and do nothing?
if you had 2 friends that you love and one hurt the other one (the one u care for more even tho u love them both) will do u some thing about it to protect the one u care for more or sit back and do nothing?
if you had 2 pets that you love and one hurt the other one (the one u care for more even tho u love them both) will do u some thing about it to protect the one u care for more or sit back and do nothing?
can u really sit back and do nothing?
what do ur instincts tell you?

anyway, tmr's math paper.
THE HORROR.
i hope everything goes smoothly.

2008-02-22T01:18:00.003+08:00

Listening to: Something about you - Jamelia

The problem with not going to school for one entire week and nerding too much is that you tend to forget what you were supposed to do.
I left the house earlier than usual today hoping to reach school slightly earlier.
But then.
I forgot to alight at any of the 5 - 7 stops that i could alight at to transfer to another bus.
okay i didnt forget lah.
I did remember and told myself that i would alight at the 5th stop to be safe.
But then my mp3 player started playing this song and i started thinking about stuff and then i totally just got lost in my own world and by the time i realised it, it was too late.
hahaha. yeah, my bus went all the way to toa payoh.
So I had to take the bus to divert back.
so ma fan and in the end, its no different from me just leaving the house just the usual timing (which always happen to coincide with each other considering i dont really monitor the time i leave the house, only today).
I still cant believe what stupidity i exuded today.

Anyway, last lesson today, Econs.
Going for econs is always a hoot.
I think Manfred Ting is funny but not funny. (SONG ONE!)
hahahahaha.
but i think his lectures are awesome.
he's quite a nag but the knowledge i get from his lectures are plenty! And in every single lecture i always realise or learn new things. I really applaud teachers/lecturers who can stir up an interest for the subject within me when i hated the subject to begin with.
1st Paper Econs this saturday.
all the best everyone!
im going to start my econs revision tmr.
yes, i know, like crash course like that can.
thats becos i started on math first.
im having more problems with math.

UOL pass year exams papers and answers arrived from london on my doorstep today.
still awaiting my license.
taking so long to arrive....

need to send my phone for repair soon.
its been acting weird.
for this reason i had to delete all my msgs from my saved msgs.
wasnt very thrilled about and i have been putting off repairing my phone becos of it.
but i cant hold it any longer becos my warranty is going to be over soon.
guess thats life huh.
but its a step that i have to take like it or not.
anyway, i really like my phone becos it has alot in it other than just being a phone.
it definitely reminds me of plenty of things that occured.
This phone is definitely one phone that has been with me while memories have been made.
so having it around me just reminds me of happy things. =)
haha, sounds so lame right..

my mp3 player has gone mad on me too becos it keep hanging.
will need to bring it down to creative one day after exams, maybe after church one day since its so near.

anyway, i solved the 4 by 4 rubik's (fully solved) using logic and abit of my 3 by 3 rubik's knowledge (i can solve the 3 by 3).
took me 5 hours to solve (spent about half an hour on it per day).

ok back to the books now.

2008-02-19T21:41:00.005+08:00

listening to: hide and seek by imogen heap

so i threw on a hoodie, a pair of jeans and put on my socks and loafers.
andd then i grabbed a sling bag (one that i used to carry alot to classes in jc) and dumped all my stuff inside it, including my green zen mp3 and my red puma jacket.
i proceeded to tie up my hair (in all its full blown wavy-ness) and clip it up everywhere.
with that, in all my dorky-ness, i left the house and made my way to tampines library.

hahah, sounds like a story im writing but isnt my blog like a story of my life anyway?
anyway, i stayed in the library from about 12 plus to about 5 plus.
and i only did integration.
but its okay.
not bad.
considering that i totally forgot about it and had no clue when i flipped open the chapter.
everything was erased from my mind since the a levels ended.

studying in the library reminded me of when i studied for the a levels.
i still remember the weekly weekends at downtown east or the library.
also, it was almost everyday during the study break.
and worse still, i started mugging in the day and then it hit all the way into the night.
but most of the time with friends.
this time, im doing it alone.
my pace is slower this time and im relaxing more than i did the last time but i dont want another burn out again.
dont think i can take it.
but i hope that the pace will be just right for me to take flight during the actual exams and not during the prelims.
i dont mind still being on the runway for prelims.

stuff aside, im abit moody these days.
dont know why also.
okay maybe i know why but im not so sure also.
aiyah...

i wanna watch ps i love you but i bet it will be gone by then.
the book alone made me weep.
its really so sad.
its so rare that i read and book and cry over it.
i mean there was another book, red letter day (about a woman whose husband died and she met the indirect-killer and what happens and all).
but these 2 books are by far the best books i've ever written.
and to be honest, i dont think all cecilia ahern books are good.
but colette caddle definitely writes fantastic books without fail, jane green and marian keyes cant beat her.
=)

anyway, after prelims, im gonna try to destress abit and not go crazy trying to mug every minute, every sec like i did after a level prelims like as if every waking moment was to precious to even breathe.

2008-02-16T23:18:00.006+08:00

Listening to: worn me down by rachel yamagata
(i can listen to this song repeatedly for the whole day. lyrics strike a chord in me!)

Recently I've been at bugis and suntec alot.
ok I've also been at vivo and tampines (duh) alot too.
I decided that I miss heartlands like Toa Payoh and Bedok.
Was at Causeway point the other day.
Havent been there in a while and apparently nothing much has changed.
other than the fact that they have metro there.
And metro has one of my favourite brands, namely chocolate.
and anyway, becos of this invention called the bus, theres this time-space compression thing (socio girls: recall david harvey! Oh crap, im doing it again. stupid prelims.) which makes travelling from woodlands to home much faster.
168 takes barely 30 mins to get me from woodlands to tampines, faster than the train would.

anyway, last night was the eREV excercise where u sort of choose ur classes online for the revision period.
and we thought it would be like eCR so we started msn convo windows tro discuss which classes to take.
but in the end it was so messy and i got signed out of the student portal and couldnt sign in for 30 whole mins, i got seriously so angry becos after that all the good timings classes got snapped up.
also, we cldnt coordinate our classes tog so im in different lectures.
and i have weekend classes.
I was so angry that i started scolding the computer (I felt bad after that and apologised to it) and couldnt stop scolding it for i think half an hour.
I was so mad!
GRIEVE.
anyway, timetable up on right hand column of blog.
again, GRIEVE.

Ive also decided that I will stop coming online so often.
I usually do things like mark my tutorials online or what not.
or get windows updates or defrag or scan or what ever crap.
but exams are really close.
need full attention.
Ive decided to start going to the library.
as it is, i've not properly started my revision.
and i feel like i've not done enough.
Im really scared.
oh no!

i havent had much sleep or food the past few days.
and actually i have no idea why too.
been sleeping at 2/3am.
and barely have about 2 meals + maybe some snacks here and there.
sometimes just one.
really not very hungry.
i dont know why.
and this has had repercussions.
i have lost 4kg in total.
I just hope my appetite comes back.
speaking of which, i felt it was ok to take my first dose of chilli today (recovered enough from the flu).
yummmy.
How can anyone not have chilli in their meals?
if u are one of them, u are missing out on alot!

oh yah and and and.
I have the 4 x 4 rubik's cube (credits to junwei) =))
and
i almost solved it!
like using logic alone and ok maybe abit of my 3 x 3 cube knowledge.
but its so different!
i cldnt solve the last part cos the thing cldnt flip and apparently junwei said its some flip error thing that occurs once in a while.
so i actually solved like 98% of the 4 x 4 on my own (altho it took me like 3 hrs?)

alright, ttfn.

_______________________

edit: introducing 2 nice song, listen.
sorry cant find full version on imeem, so used youtube.

2008-02-15T12:17:00.000+08:00

for every single day of my life...........

2008-02-14T03:15:00.020+08:00

[Post edited for the one millioneth time]

Socio girls go to sentosa.
Pictures (click for larger picture):

I am the king of the world!

(or not? bethia what are u doing? hahaha)

Yo.

Like Marilyn Monroe!

Hadouken!

BANG!

The kitchen is over there!

(Khai! follow the mocca guy lah!) =)

Its a bird, a plane! Its superman!
(with our backs to the camera with its timer on.
Huiling: Er.. how do we know whether the camera has taken?
Bethia: I think we wait a while in this position
Huiling who is unable to stop laughing: Quick! My hand tired already!)

Act your cutest!

Give me your most horrid face!
(Khai is damn funny here)

Suddenly I'm in London!

Haha, no not my car (sadly).

Like girls in car showrooms.

May the force be with me!

Human Lego!

The beautiful Sentosa cove!

Trying to hold back the laugh for the last 3 pics.

Sunshine is penetrating right into Bethia's eyes

and she kept saying "Ha kin lah!" (which means hurry up in hokkien)

and it set me off in laughter.

Too bright to look, dreary old sun!

Haha, yes i carry with me a white nokia 6288 (nice ok) .

Now you know.

And anyway, it keeps restarting on me!

Need to send for repair soon.

What?what? sorry was smsing.

Jump!

Libin, u are super funny here.

Who set the timer off?

what? going to take already?

ok hurry everyone do a pose its gonna take already!

Oh crap I dont have the card again.

Down by the water, the sound of the waves.... Nice.

This is how you play volleyball.

And this is how you catch a frisbee

Lets play Frisbee!

Preparing to volleyball hit the ball when it gets pulled back down by gravity.

London Vs Sentosa Cove

Dinner!

(pics of me with brown lenses,

pictures in friendster ~~and facebook~~. too lazy to upload it here.)

The problem with having my green creative zen plugged into my ears on the train is that I really dont pay much attention to what station I'm at, especially if im seated with my back to the station.
So when a song ended and i heard the train announce "Tiong Bahru", I nearly cursed out loud (but of cos i never do that! only in my head!).
Because not only did i miss my stop at outram to transfer to the NEL, I was also running 8 mins late.

So we got lost around the roads in sentosa and the signs are really not clear.
Also, i'm a really poor map-reader.
Dont ever take me on the amazing race, I wont be able to differientiate a mountain and a hill.
So Khai had to do so many u turns (Thank u so much and sorry im so bad at reading maps!).
Tanjong beach was voted to be the choice yesterday (altho I have always gone to Pallawan whenever I go to sentosa).
But hey, what do we know? There were seats at Tanjong beach, altho we had to buy a jug of drink but its okay.
and then it was endless frisbee and some volleyball and cool water waves!
not forgetting, the old game of uno.
(credits to PC for the fans and calendars and map aka beach map).
and i realise its funny when u meet someone again when u've not met them for a long time.
Its like, "hey your hair has grown!" or "You've grown taller!".
But for PC, he just looked the same! except less tired tho.
reminded me of my family doctor.
(the guy who never grows old even tho he has been giving me jabs ever since i was merely an infant).
anyw, we stayed at the beach til 3 or 4 plus i cant rem.
But i did remember hoping around and screaming, "omg the sand is so hot! Slippers!".

Libin was burnt like a crab and i think i only got a tint of shade darker.
I did wish I had gotten darker because i havent been dark for a long time now.

We decided to cancel Flowers at Imbiah Lookout becos the carpark was full by the time we got there.
so in the end we ended up at sentosa cove and suddenly i'm in The OC.
Boats along the harbour, little towns for the houses with a guard house right in the front.
Big, rich mansions and houses.
Big fat break water facing the sea.
Definitely a scene cut right out from The OC.
But it was nice to be there.
I enjoyed the sea breeze and how different the place looked and felt.
hahaha, yeah we took like a million picstures.
oh and credits to Khai here becos we only cld have gone in with a car and she drove us in.
Thank you!

Dinner at vivo early becos Bethia had to collect her phone.
and yes Bethia i agree with you about samsung phones. =)
thai expresss was the choice, too bad I couldnt take the tom yam because i was still coughing.
Then again, i have been eating and drinking like im ok.
other than refraining from spicy food and carbonated drinks.
anyway, Gloria jean's Coffees after that!
MOCHA CHILLERS COOKIES AND CREAM!
yes, i was delighted and i think my eyes even gleamed with the excitement of devouring the poor and helpless cookies and cream mocha chiller.
we decided to take it to the deck that overlooked sentosa and we talked and laughed and Libin (who had alr made us laugh non stop the entire day) made us laugh even more!

I really think that the socio girls have been such a great group.
Thanks u girls for not only sharing the fun and laughter with me but also being able to put down a listening ear whenever. =)
we will definitely meet every so often next time even after socio class ends ok!
every single one of u.
and this currently marks the beginning of prelims.
SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHY OVERHEADS CHARGED = BUDGETED = OAR X ACTUAL HOURS.
I have been staring at this POA question and i really cannot get it.

On a lighter note,
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY AND HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY TO EVERYONE!
sometimes, things dont work out, be it your way or the right way.
But whatever it is, things cannot be undone.
the best thing to do right now is to be thankful for what u have right now.
And for other issues, u can think about it every single day of your life or even every single moment in your life,
but u cannot change them.
u can only live with it.
and accept it, like it or not.

Anyw, heres wishing all my friends a happy frienship day!
Thanks for being there for me through my dark periods and every single one of u has been remembered.
CHEEERS!

PS: Happy Belated 21st to Libin.

sorry that our planning was super bad and not as good as the birthday surprise u guys planned for me last nov. Yes im a super bad organiser and super bad at planning. sorry girls!

But cheers anyway! You now officially dont need parent's signature! =)) whoots!

2008-02-10T20:59:00.000+08:00

Apparently cny has been alright this year.
perhaps except for the very nagging flu bug as well as the constant haunting of the prelims at the back of my mind. (ok not very back of my mind becos every minute and every second im thinking about the bloody prelims).
but whatever right, becos in the end, i did not do any studying at all, nope, none.
and this was how i spent my cny.

basically, the usual reunion dinner.
although not the same house this year.
its always changing for some reason or another.

first day was non stop meet and greet for a few hrs at my grandma's.
everybody gathered there so we dont have to move too much (thank God becos it was a major frying pan out there).
but anyway we went home early that day becos mum and i werent feeling all that fantastic.
with a throat sore-er than sore and a nose that saw no daylight, you basically dont really want to do anything else other than get well like immediately.

Things were a little different on the second day.
we had an early start that day and we visited 3 houses.
the gang moved together and ended up together .
and even though i've only played mahjong like once in my entire life,
i sort of just remembered how to play again and went with the flow.
we did not gamble with money though.
but we did use the whole box of kueh-bang-kit as a threat, or an incentive rather, to win.
the loser supposedly supposed to eat the whole box of kueh-bang-kit and it was reminded to everyone at the table at the start of every fresh new mahjong game.
Hahaha, the poor kueh-bang-kit, sitting there, looking helpless.
anyway, we played mahjong for hours, even though i kept asking what tile was thrown out and whether it was my turn becos things went so fast at first.
after that i did catch up and it was quite fun.
we rotated seats and i kept saying that the person before me kept giving me lao pok tiles cos it was all the dong nan xi bei fa zhong and the funny looking tile, which one of my younger cousin calls the bathtub tile.
my shoes gave me a blister on the first day and it hurt to bad.
i dont understand why every shoe i wear gives me blisters.
and you wonder why i always prefer to don on flip flops.

third day, sat,the celebration came to me.
my house was more crowded than i've ever seen it before.
it was quite fun having about 10 people snatching stuff from the steamboat, laughing, talking and joking.
we played games after that and it was so much fun and such a laugh.

I think cny is different this year also because sister is back for cny for the 1st time in 4 years.

anyway, apart from all that, i did miss all the cny foodies like the dried cuttle fish and bakwa and what not.
and i did not eat alot as well, probably due to the lack of appetite from being down with the flu.
i think i drank more green tea than i had food.
and i still remember how i used to hate green tea back in primary school.
I remember back then i had a best friend who would buy green tea everyday and i thought it was disgusting. I always thought it was like water that was bubbled with perfume which was so gross.
anyway, one day my aunt was shifting house and we helped out.
I was so thirsty from all the moving around but there was no water around, only green tea.
So there was no choice but to gulp it down. But that was then when i realised that I dont hate green tea all that much and actually liked it.
but i would still choose the green justea over greentea any day.

anyway, i realise i havent been to the movies at all for a long long time.
perhaps i will soon again.
really wanna watch ps i love you (the book alone made me weep!), jumper and the leap years.
but i wld probably not have the time anyway and i would convince myself that its a waste of money in the end.
oh and ive been watching csi miami alot too thanks to my sis.
and although the show is alot of bullshit and has a lot of cheesy lines, i still like it anyway.
haha, but not as much as the oc hahahaha.

Hmm and i havent been able to sleep well recently or get to sleep.
i have no idea why but perhaps its becos subconsciously im thinking about alot.
anyway, the joy luck club has been my bedtime story book recently and even though its from my sister, ive got to admit that its really all not that bad (becos books from my sister would usually be very intellectual and difficult to understand).

anyway, so sch sort of ends for me here, with lessons on thursdays only.
prelims start on 23rd feb (see the side bar of my blog).
alright, gtg.
wanted to post cny pic but too tired to do so.
and its alr in facebook n friendster anyway.

cheers and happy cny guys! =)

2008-02-04T10:30:00.000+08:00

Listening to: Wont go home without you By Maroon 5

I start this post by telling you how i account for my 12 demerit points during my driving test.
first, insufficient acceleration, twice.
and then, speed too slow, twice again.
next, veering off course once. Because I kept too much distance between the illegally parked cars and my own car. Hence i went too much into the opposite road.
and lastly, not using the appropriate gear, once. I wasnt confident of using gear 4 so i stayed at gear 3 and the engine became so loud but i still wasnt confident in changing up.
anyway, sister has treated me to a great lunch at this really ATAS place to celebrate me obtaining my license. =D

My stomach wasnt feeling well yesterday
and like i told mum, the pain was equivalent to that of giving birth
mum argues that i've not given birth before
but i told her that the pain i experienced was so intense and unbearable and so i pretty much concluded that it must have felt the same as giving birth.
anyway, im glad i did fall asleep becos when i woke up this morning it was nothing but relief.
although the after-effects can be felt
its like the after shock of an earthquake

today's the last stats lesson.
actually my lesson is on tuesdays but i decided to join the socio girls for lecture.
My last POA lesson was on friday so that has ended too.

its scary becos prelims are in about 2 weeks and ive not accomplished much.
but many of us are pretty much in the cny mood already.

alright, cant think of anything else to say.
so ttfn

_________________________________

edited:
i rarely post pictures on my blog
but yes, im dead happy about it even though it may not be a big deal to you
its a huge deal to me
i paid my entire way through and finally got it.
YESSSSSSS.

2008-01-30T13:40:00.000+08:00

Listening to: Now That you're near By Hillsong United (Christian song)

My instructor arrived at my house this morning at about 745am.
nervous as i was, i kept praying.
we drove to the driving centre at top speed, i hit about 65km/hr.
We had a circuit lesson first and i was still so blur.
made endless mistakes inside, mistakes that could have caused an immed failure.
I saw a guy taking his test and he mounted the curb, immed failure.
after that i saw him pull up at the driving centre without even going off to the road.
so freaky and scary.
but i Kept praying that it will not affect me, just concentrate on what i have to do.
In the end, its really all Credits to God.
I did not even get a single demerit point in the circuit even though i did make a mistake (didnt release handbrake totally after slope and didnt even realise til so long after but i quickly rectified the problem when tester turned his lead left).
On the road, i scored some demerits here and there for some mistakes.
stalled my engine twice because i was so nervous but i quickly restarted the engine so no demerits for that.
scored a total of 12 demerit points and I PASSED!
Truthfully, its all thanks to God.
If i drove how i did this morning, i would have failed.
Seriously..
also, thanks to everyone for all the support.
thanks to
1. God for giving me strength and wisdom to help me pass
2. My family, mum and sis, for their continual support and for believing in me. Mum, for her financial support initially. After that when i had enough, i returned her the amount and self funded my lessons.
3. Army boy, for his continual support and taking all my crying and shit from getting upset over driving ever so frequently. He also believed in me.
4. My friends: Manda, Evan, Libin, Khai, Bethia, Zhongfen (MAY!), Stephanie for listening to my constant whining about how i did badly for driving lessons and always supporting me, believing in me and giving me advice on what to do and all. Thank you all!
5. Huiyi, for recommending me her instructor cos he really puts in effort to make sure his students pass.
6. My instructor for constantly nagging at me and scolding me and teaching me the right manner.

I'm really really happy.
and even though i don't have a family car to drive yet, heck it. i bought my p plate already.
hahahaha.
and when my sister called she was like damn funny.
the first thing she said was , "Wa lao you're not even 20 yet get license already."
HAHAHAHA.
yeah lor, i just turned 19.

oh yah like just now before the test there were like close to 25 pple in the waiting room.
thats when u wait for the testers to come n pick u up and stuff.
and then after the test, those who passed supposed to go to the video room to watch some video and get ur result slips chopped and signed.
but less than 10 returned.
cos we were supposed to wait for everyone from that test batch to come back (only those who passed) before they started the video. so scary!
so really thank God!

so thanks to all on my list just now and everyone la!
I couldnt have done it without u guys and of cos God. =))
CHEERS.

ok wait, i just realise i shldnt be too happy yet.
cos now that ive passed my driving test, it means that its time to start mugging for prelims cos its in less than 3 wks time.
oh no oh no oh no.
=)

2008-01-29T15:59:00.000+08:00

Listening: Tattoo Jordin Sparks

I've had a tough week because i've been dealing with driving.
My test is tomorrow but i guess being nervous or afraid wont do anything to help me pass.
I will just give my best shot into it and apply what I know.
The most important here is that I wont be fighting this battle alone.
Need prayers from you guys reading this! keep me in prayer!
I need to pass this.
I stood for 45 mins at the driving centre today and observed cars that were taking the test.
Most of them did well and did not have any mistakes and i do hope and pray that i will be like that too.

So my week hasn't been spectecular as you can see.
Lots of driving, then lessons, then night driving again.
But i did join the Investment Club in my school with Candice and I got to know more people.
Yesterday after drivng and lesson, the club had a welcome meeting and we played alot of games.
we played whacko first and we had to remember names and in the midst of all the fun i totally blanked out twice and had to do forfeit, one of which required someone to draw a moon with lipstick on my cheek and it was HUGE ok.
anyw, we had dinner and then we played some group games.
one of which is a common game played in taiwan variety shows.
basically ten pple represent the group and line up in a row and faces the front (looking at the back of the person infront).
the person right at the back of the line is brought to a place and given a word.
he then has to think of an action to describe it.
once he has thought of the action, he then taps the back of the person infront.
the person infront will turn around and watch the other guy act it out in silence.
he is given 30 secs to watch before he taps the back of the next person and acts it out.
so the msg gets passed on in mere action until it reaches the end of the line and the last guy has to guess what it is, given the category.
It was so funny lah.
we couldnt stop laughing.
there was once when this team was given the word "Terminator" under movies.
and so he flexed his muscles upwards, then downwards and then he pretended to be shooting with two guns in all directions.
as the action was passed down the line, it turned out to look more and more like a porn movie.
oh man it was so funny okay.
and i really enjoyed myself.
I do hope to learn new stuff from this club as well.
and everyone was really nice.

ok i've got to go.
keep me in prayer for my test tmr! =)

*I will not fight this battle alone*

2008-01-23T11:15:00.000+08:00

I went to the doctor's last night.
mum and i walked 2 bustops down to my old house.
back when i was a baby, i lived 2 bustops down and we used to see this family doctor.
and until now, we still trust him becos of his expertise.
the funny thing is, I have grown massively.
but my doctor has not aged one tiny bit.
his hair is still as black as ever and his face still has the same serious-doctorly-look without wrinkles.
anyway, he gave me some medicines and i can say that it has helped me today and hopefully i stay that way.

yesterday after stats class, i just wanted to go home, not do anything and rest.
my head was spinning so badly and my muscles were achng.
i could not concentrate at all.
of cos this was before i went to the doctor's.
when i left school and i saw 151 approaching, i silently just prayed, "give me a seat, God. I want to close my eyes and rest."
and guess what.
to my surprise, the nokia sofa bus came!
and there were a few empty seats.
so i took one of the egg sofa seats and just closed my eyes for the entire time.
and then i saw this girl on the bus who looked just like Anna, i wasnt sure if it was her though becos it didnt look like the Anna i last saw.
but the likeness was so great, what she was wearing, how she clipped her fringe back, painted toenails, the cleo mag she was holding on to...
and omg the face..
(Anna you shld have seen her!)

ive got a test later in socio class.
but its open book.
its the last socio class today.
which means the syllabus is coming to an end, which means i need to quickly recover and start studying.
which also means my driving test is exactly one week away.
OH NO OH NO.
anyway, ive got night driving lesson later, circuit and road lesson.

i need to recover ~~soon~~ RIGHT NOW.

2008-01-21T10:38:00.000+08:00

Got this from friendster - horoscopes:

Today, you might have to watch yourself when you exposed to your greatest temptation. If it's cookies or cake, you should preemptively fill up on vegetables so you won't be weak. If it's that certain someone who always gets your heart beating faster, you should just get out of there as quickly as you can! You know what's bad for you, and you know you need to stay away from it right now. So do whatever you have to do get out of the danger zone -- and into the green zone.

ok not that i believe in it, just for fun.
ahahahah.
yes i shld get myself back to the green zone.
now all i need is directions towards the green zone.

i haven't exactly been well, its weird.
its kind of a health issue but not really?
i think people like evan and junwei should know.
it happened during the onset of a levels.
and it has happened again.
i need to recover soon, or now rather.
theres my tests and exams to study for and then theres my driving test next week.
now, now, now.

i left my mp3 player at junwei's house on saturday.
no music for me this week i guess.

sister and mum is helping me get some rest.
i have alienated myself from studies and driving or any form of it.
its total rest for me til i recover.
but having said that of cos i still have school and driving lessons (altho i cancelled my driving lesson today).

short post, dont ask, bye. =)

2008-01-17T11:13:00.000+08:00

30th Jan 2008
i hate the freaking s course...

27 feb 2008 - 14 mar 2008
08 may 2008 - 20 may 2008

holy crap they are all approaching.

2008-01-14T17:25:00.000+08:00

Peasant girl : "Mother, will you let me go to the towns?"
Mother : "How much will it cost?"
Peasant girl : "8 gold coins, Mother."
Mother : "To get 8 gold coins, I will need to sell off this land and all the cattle. What will we live on?"
Sister : "Because of my arrangements with the elders, they have been giving me copper coins for my diligence and labour. I now have 100 copper coins kept in the drawer under my bed. I will give them to you. You will go to the towns. It is a good chance to do so. Only the rich can afford to go to the towns and even though we are not rich, I will loan you the gold coins, or eveb give them to you. What are gold coins if not spent?"
Peasant girl : "I cannot do so. Going to the towns is not a requirement. You have laboured your life away for the elders to earn these coins, I cannot jus take them."
Sister : "Yes you can. It will be a good opportunity. It will be worth it if you make full use of it."

2008-01-11T12:16:00.000+08:00

Location: School, Library.
Listening (On my Creative Zen) to: Who Knew By Pink
Its such a sad song because its about an unpredictable death of someone very dear i think or thats how i interpreted it. It had the same effect on me as "How to save a life by the fray".

"Who Knew" By Pink

You took my hand
You showed me how
You promised me you'd be around
Uh huh
That's right
I took your words
And I believed
In everything
You said to me
Yeah huh
That's right

If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong
I know better
Cause you said forever
And ever
Who knew

Remember when we were such fools
And so convinced and just too cool
Oh no
No no
I wish I could touch you again
I wish I could still call you friend
I'd give anything

When someone said count your blessings now
'fore they're long gone
I guess I just didn't know how
I was all wrong
They knew better
Still you said forever
And ever
Who knew

Yeah yeah
I'll keep you locked in my head
Until we meet again
Until we
Until we meet again
And I won't forget you my friend
What happened

If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong and
That last kiss
I'll cherish
Until we meet again
And time makes
It harder
I wish I could remember
But I keep
Your memory
You visit me in my sleep
My darling
Who knew
My darling
My darling
Who knew
My darling
I miss you
My darling
Who knew
Who knew

____________________________________

I've long forgotten what it feels like to leave home at 630am in the morning.
See, when i was in JC, it was only a few mins walk away and i had always left home at 710am.
Also, when i was working last year, work was barely an hour away and i leave my house at 655am.
so to leave so early today really brought back memories, memories of the time when i was still in secondary school and had to leave this early because apparently councillors had to prepare themselves for morning duties.
anyway, i walked amongst the school kids that were trooping towards the bustop as well and i felt young again! It was like as if i never grew up!
oh well, back to reality.
I took a bus to Tanah Merah and then a train from there to Dover.
Throughout the entire ride I stood and it was not as if i could not get seats but apparently people kept rushing for them as if their lives depended on the seats.
I decided to stay out of this madness.
Slept for barely 4 hours last night and hence i was compelled to close my eyes while standing.
Here's what I can conclude about the battle between the train and the bus.

Train Over Bus:
1. Its faster, duh. So it wastes less time.

Bus over Train:
1. Its cheaper.
2. I get a seat 99% of the time. Hene I get to either rest or read my lecture notes on the bus. plus the seats are quite comfortable. (Btw, i prefer sbs bus seats compared to smrt bus seats.)
3. I dont have to walk up and down the stairs/cross the road/take the underpass.
4. It may be as fast as the train on certain times of the day.
5. Theres TV mobile if i need a break or if my mp3 player has died.

But note that the point given to trains is quite hefty.

anyway, i had driving yesterday and he couldnt book a place for me in the circuit.
we are resorting to night lessons.
Next wk i have 2 lessons, one on monday at 230pm and one on wednesday at 845pm.
The day lesson would be solely for road learning and the night lesson would be used as a mix, partly for circuit learning and then partly for road learning (conditions at night).
I really hope i survive and ace my upcoming test.
eeps.

Okay my prelims are coming and are definitely gonna be pervading my life.
so i apologise first if i become very distracted and inattentive.
prelims are from 27 feb to 14 mar (although the actual timetable is not out yet)
But the actual exams will be held in may (tentative timetable is out) which shld be from 8th may to 20th may.

the chinese new year is coming!
but what celebration is there when im supposed to be mugging?
ok i gtg now,
tata!

2008-01-09T10:22:00.000+08:00

Listening to Ying Wei By Fan Wei Qi.
(Heard this in the cab yesterday so i just remembered that its a very very nice song, and i like it even though my chinese isnt that good, i still understand ok!)

Here are the replies to the tags...
Amanda:
1. Becos u seemed like someone who would be a good friend. You also seemed like someone who was always cheerful, happy and lively.
2. Running!
3. Your Lively character! actually got more la. also didnt knw which one so jus have to pick one. =)
4. Alot leh. butI'm gonna name some then. You pushing me out of the queue at the tom yam stall everyday in shss for recess! haha! Then u racing with me down the stairs, to the toilet, everywhere also run run run! Then we singing songs and making shaun lee irritated at us. Oh and then us scribbling on pple's fullscaps (at the back) with our markers. LOL.
5. I dont know what to ask... okay er..? do u have a photographic memory? hahaha.
6. Thank You for being my friend for so long and genuinely being there for me! =)
7. Okay in turn, u must post this on ur blog? optional.

here's the one she did for me:
1. Haven't I said this zillions of times?!? Cuz you looked like the coolest person in class! And I kept wishing we'll get to be friends or something. Wa crap I sound like a despo guy -.-
2. THE OC. How could anyone forget. Aye plus nemo and spongebob! Is mugging very hard considered?
3. You laugh at everything I say which I find not funny.
4. You being there for me, sitting beside me and scolding the open space in front of you when something happened during Aug two years ago.
5. WHYYYY AM I ON PAR WITH NEMO!?!
(My ans: Becos its funny to put u both on par. HAHAHAA.)
6. You're the best of the entire 4A. Or rather, the BGF of my life :)))
7. You obviously don't have to repost this right? So lame.

Anna:
1. Becos I thought it would be better off for us to be friends rather than being rivals for few reasons. Like we had alot in common right. Plus our shared interest was no longer our shared interest. So it would better to be friends right.
2. Online sprees.
3. Your smile =)
4. Also got quite a few for you. haha. ok i name one. You in ur handbell dress performing at CHIJMES performance, synergy.
5. Why did u join handbell after volleyball?
6. I still have the diary that i wrote in of the things that were happening when we were rivals for the longest dinosaur time ever! hahaha.
7. You dont have to, u already did. =)

Here's the one she did for me:
1. because we generally have a lot in common, just that we started as rivals.
2. mischa barton/oc
3. your height
4. i would occassionally see you walking to/from the 291 busstop from/to school with terence wang.
5. why you liked him in the first place.
6. your default pic. ( this qn was modified.)
7. in return, you must post this in your LJ (or in your case, maybe blogspot)

______________________________________

hello world,
im back to blog about my past few days.
which is nothing fascinating seriously.

monday i had a driving lesson at 4pm at ubi.
and i completely freaked out becos of the number of cars on the road at that time.
i totally panicked and made mistakes i shldnt be making by now.
which brings me to worry once again about my driving test which is drawing near, very very near.

Yesterday i had stats class and some hubbub happened before that.
but its all long forgotten now and i dont wish to talk about it anyway.
anyw, after that i met the socio girls (why are u guys called the socio girls when u guys are in my econs class also huh? shld be called the business girls right since u all taking BSc Business also.)
and then we went to eat and study.
And thanks to Bethia! I now understand something which i didnt before (one of the concepts in socio) for the test today.
I hope i dont screw up this test...

so its test today later.
driving tmr. (assignment due as well, which by the way, ive not even started on yet.)
Test on friday.

im taking the mrt this friday to sch in the morning becos apparently no matter how early i leave and take the stupid bus, it never gets me there on time.
hence im trying out the mrt this friday and if its really awesome, perhaps i'll consider taking the mrt on friday mornings. =)))
buses and roads are never predictable.

alright ive gotta run now.

2008-01-06T23:57:00.000+08:00

I've been thinking of shifting my blog to livejournal so that i can partially lock it.
Or perhaps even fully locking this blog.
but there are its pros and cons.

Advantages of Having a Livejournal (LJ):
1. I can partially lock it or fully lock it. For partial locking, i can blog entires that are strictly available to friends only or even myself only. Hence its neater.
2. Theres LJ cut which makes everything so much neater.

Disadvantages of having a LJ:
1. Friends may not have LJ accounts so its quite troublesome.
2. I have no idea how to customise LJ layouts, quite used to the html in blogger already.
3. Archiving is quite messy there.

i'm still considering okay.

oh yes anyw, okay ive put in alot of thought into this and yesterday while i was at junwei's house and he was putting together for himself a new computer ( i was so impressed i tell you), i came up with my new set of new year resolutions.
its very late and very cheesy i know.
and most people dont fulfil them anyway but i'm quite determined to.
so here it is:
1. Improve my Chinese.
- Hua Yu Cool.. No, really I need to brush this up, its atrocious.
2. Pass My driving test on first try.
3. Do well in the exams this year (sorry not revealing my aimed marks.)
4. Increase Savings and Reduce consumption.
- According to Econs, if eveyone has this as their resolution and tries to fulfil it, the economy will go into recession due to the paradox of thrift. hahaha.
5. Make more time for my friends.
6. Learn a new skill / improve on one of my existing skills.
7. Go running and swimming more often. (Have to start when my flu is cleared up.)
8. Get an attachment at a good place.
9. Get 12pm classes for the new sem in aug/sept (i dont mind 1 330pm class and 3 12pm classes.)
10. Run and Complete the 10km Standard Chartered Marathon 2008.
- Time to start feeding on glucosamine and strengthening up my knees.
- Sister is going to run the half marathon so good luck to her!
11. Become healthier : eat right and Live right.
- I need to prevent all those illnesses that hit me in 2007 or reoccuring ones too.
12. Phase into being 20 years old by 17 nov 2008.
- Its the first year of adulthood. So i need to learn to be one.
13. Forget and let go of some occurences in 2007.

alright so thats about it.
i wanted to blog about other stuff but im really super tired now.
and i got stuff to do
and i need to sleep soon
as i have driving tmr at 4pm
need to concentrate
so bye!

PS: I realise that i miss playing pool! ever since tampines took kpool away, i havent gotten around to playing pool much. =(

2008-01-05T23:50:00.000+08:00

FOR CERTAIN REASONS THAT ARE PERSONAL,

I MIGHT BE LOCKING MY BLOG IN THE FUTURE

AND KEEPING IT STRICTLY TO FRIENDS

OR MOVING TO LIVEJOURNAL.

2008-01-04T00:13:00.000+08:00

Listening to:
Here with me by Dido (Theme song of Roswell). Very Nice..
PS: anyone has the show?

Something happened the other day and it made me laugh so much.
It occurred on New Year;s Day itself.
I happened to be in the Popular outlet in Tampines Mall and I was in the stationery section searching for a particular marker pen when I heard an exchange between a kid and her mum.
The kid, in all her innocence and grammatically unsound english, asked her mum, "Mum, are you sure tomorrow I'll be Primary one?"
Her Mum replied, "Yes, I'm very sure."
And the kid said, "But what if I wake up tomorrow and I'm not?"
And the reply came back as, "Don't worry, I'm very sure."
I couldn't help but let out a short laugh and her mother smiled at me.
This situation reminded me of myself when i was younger.
Back when i was still in primary school, the night just before the 1st day of school for the year I would cry a quiet cry (not the whining and screaming kind) and ask my mum, "Mum what if i get scolded tomorrow?"
Of course my mother would ask what i would get scolding for.
and I would say, "I don't know. Just a scolding."
See, St. Hilda's Primary was (and still is) pretty strict with their students and i remember one incident which called for a scolding for the entire class and i was the first to cry.
WHAT A LOUSY CRACK I WAS!

Anyway, the beginning of the year doesnt signify much for me because my semesters don't run according to the calendar year anymore.
Unlike previous practices in school, i dont get promoted with the year.

I had driving in the morning today.
Circuit lesson was pretty fun.
although i still made some mistakes.
but cut me some slack! it was barely my 2nd circuit lesson
and anyway i have improved so much from the 1st lesson.
after that i went straight to school.
i reached school pretty early, which was good because i had time to eat lunch.
yesterday i have no idea why i left the house so late or why the busride took so long.
i took nearly an entire hour to travel to my transfer bustop to switch buses and i nearly missed my stop because i was reading some notes.
I would have alighted earlier as i have a choice of alighting at 5 stops but the weird thing is, at all 5 stops, the fare for the next bus i board varies (but not for the bus i was on).
anyway, so i reached school so late yesterday that i didnt even bother to take my lunch.
i starved til break time.
my lecturer kept going on and on and on and on and on and on.
No i dont blame him also cos he has to cover whatever that needs to be covered.
but i was just so hungry i was ready to eat an entire cow! (figure of speech, i dont eat entire cows!)
and i was still attentive and could still jot down notes with my brain still functioning even though thy stomach was ready to kill a cow. (Again, figure of speech.)

anyw, i have some new year resolutions in my head already but i havent exactly thought much about it yet.
will blog about it when i have decided? yes.

some updates, lets see.
I cut my hair.
Okay more like i layered my hair to ensure it didnt look so fat and thick.
kept my length..
but its very very layered now.
and i redyed my hair because it was half black and half brown.
so i redyed it on the eve of new year's eve.
I sat in the toilet for an hour as i didnt want to leave any blobs of dye anywhere else around the house.
of course i was reading stuff so i wasn't just wasting my time sitting in the toilet stonning away.

ok i have to stop here.
I need to pack for tmr and then sleep.
I have an 830am POA lesson tmr and i need to be awake and in full concentration for this.
In fact, i always try to concentrate for all lectures.

GOODNIGHT WORLD.
or good morning rather, since its already 12am plus.

2007-12-31T23:59:00.000+08:00

WARNING: END OF THE YEAR POST.

A VERY LONG POST.

The end of the year has come and its time for me to pen my end-of-the-year post.
I started this blog in 2004.
and at the end of the year i had tribute post.
in 2005, my tribute post was embedded as part of my blog skin.
it was like lying in one of the columns.
hence there is no archive for it.
in 2006, i was really busy and hence i had absolutely no time to pen down such a post.
This year i am going to pen down memories and thoughts about the entire year as well as some in the past.

First, i begin with how i did not begin school this year on 02 jan 2007.
instead, i reported to work.
After my A levels, i got a place as a temp girl at sbs transit.
Mum was quite glad and even though she did not work at the HQ and i did, we managed to go for lunch together on certain occasions whenever she dropped by the HQ for certain meetings.
It was fun working there becos i got to know alot of people and everyone was really nice.
I met alot of Mum's friends too.
When i was younger, i used to accompany mum to work on certain saturdays.
and to think that after so many years, nearly a decade, im meetings all these same people again
anyway work was quite an eye opener and a good experience.
And I would admit that i worked myself quite hard this year.
I started giving tuitions as well as work slowed down and my work schedule was quite flexible.
I took on so many tuition assignments and in the end, i gave tuition almost everyday, including saturdays.
so my normal week day would start from 8am (of cos thats if u dont include the travelling time) and then it would end at about 9pm or 930pm and then i would go home and then have my dinner and chill.
but i guess its becos i worked this hard that im able to self-finance my driving lessons.
i am very determined to pass it.
I will pass it.

So friends have come and go.
none the less, i cant believe how many people i've gotten to know this year alone.
through lectures in school, cca, through work, on the way to work, through friends that i've just gotten to know, etc.
esp the part in sch.
when i first stepped into SIM, i was sure i wasnt going to make much friends considering that we dont have classes nor project groups unlike RMIT or the local unis.
we just have to attend lectures and study.
and i remember my first week in school when i tried to intro myself to some girls sitting near me and they have me the blank look.
so much for trying huh.
i totally lost hope after that.
but hey, what do you know?
the socio girls gave me hope!
they were the first batch of friends i made in school.
and this gives me reason to say, boy am i glad to have sat where i sat on the first day of school in my very first lecture, of cos the socio lecture.

and then my sister finally came back this year.
like came back for good.
after 4 whole years.
and it was like she never even left.
okay except for some new developed characteristics
and also perhaps gotten a little smarter and taller and bigger.
other than that, hey what do we know, its the same old sister of mine.

I also got back my A level results this year.
sometimes when i think about it, i dont knw whether to be disappointed or happy.
true, i would never do this well in a sch exam.
look at it this way, my GP was a C6 or D7 all along.
i've been failing my AQ and compre and barely passing my essays.
and then all of a sudden i scored a B3 in the A levels.
Even my own sister was doubtful and i dont even blame her.
I was speechless.
And Math?
I was so ready to give up on math.
I kept gettings Os (Not zero, O.) all the way and i was sure i might just barely make it for math.
ended up with a C, not bad? but definitely not good enough to get me into businesss in the local uni.
Oh and Physics.
Physics was hell.
torturing.
but hey, all my Os and Es turned into a C.
I think i was most disappoined in my Econs.
I was hoping for a B or an A but it never happened.
My worst fears were confirmed when i flipped open the DRCS portion during the As.
C? okay. but again i stress, not good enough for the business course in the local uni.
and business was where i really wanted to end up in.
so here i am
in a business course.

When school started this year, it was quite different.
Apparently i could wear anything to school.
everything about uni is different.
and it made me miss JC and secondary school.
theres apparently no PE and no uniforms.
I still remember how we had to tuck in our shirts in JC and it annoyed the girls entirely becos the shirt was so short and tucking in would just make us look like nerds.
so alot of us girls used strings and elastic bands.
and then the teachers found out so they did checks every single morning.
I also recall the hair issue with my teacher.
I had to redye my hair back to black.
and when my natural hair grew back and she saw it was brown under the sun, she didnt believe me...
Okay and then PE, we had to run 2.4km for every SPE and we had a chance to play so many kinds of sports.
i really liked touch rugby and softball alot.
but nothing can beat volleyball.
but of cos without PE u cant possibly fall and partial dislocate ur ankle can u?
i think that this is the one thing i will never ever forget.
my mum brought me to the sinseh who twisted back my ankle.
she didnt want to trust the western medication which apparently was just the bandage and the crutches.
of cos i didnt know what had happened becos they were apparently speaking in hokkien.
and even though i am supposed to know hokkien becos my father is hokkien, i could not comprehend a word of it.
but my mum's face gave it away and when they twisted my ankle back in about 3 to 4 moves, i think i screamed so loud that i could have broken glasses for miles around.

The year has passed and its coming to a close.
Alot has happened this year i would say, ups and downs.
But right now, right here, i'm going to keep the good memories and throw out the bad ones.
so overall, it has been a good year. =)

Thanks to everyone who has helped me past this year through all my difficulties
and to those who helped me when i was not strong enough, thank you so much as well
you guys know who u are and i may not be mentioning names
but i remember everyone of u deep down
And i will always be grateful.
cheers..

HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS.

(date and timing of post has been edited for the sake of this post).

2007-12-28T22:19:00.000+08:00

Listening to: Worn me down by Rachel Yamagata.

(I kind of prefer the version that was played in the OC season 2.)

I start off this post by telling you that i dropped a bowl last night
in the kitchen
and it smashed against the concrete part near the sink.
and pieces scattered everywhere all around the kitchen floor
and the sink and some even landed up in the utility room.
pieces of broken glass were every where, big and small and even puny.
mum came to my recue and threw a pair of unworn new slippers to me.
its like as if im in a pool kicking and yelling for help and she comes along and throws me a lifefloat.
anyway so i immediately put on the slippers and grabbed the broom that mum threw to me as well.
i started sweeping away and stuff like that.
after everything was cleared, i turned over my slipper and there were alot of small bits piercing into the sole.
that could have been my feet..
but it wasn't spared anyway, i ended up with a cut near my toe.

so today mum was on leave.
i woke up and handwashed some clothes.
and then we left to go to Tampines Mall to check out the christmas sales.
but we predicted that some shops will hold back til after chinese new year next year
as chinese new year is relatively early next year.
true enough the sale wasnt as full blown as it was last year.

anyway, i cooked dinner today!
and even washed up and mopped after that.
how coolios is that?
i wanted to add the kimchi to my meal.
too bad i cldnt due to the hurting throat.

okayy ive gtg.
driving tmr morning so i need to do whatevers and then sleep.

2007-12-26T22:19:00.000+08:00

This year, I've spent more on presents for people than i have for the longest time.
I got my sister this book which she wanted and i hope she's ok with it.
(sorry i cldnt get u the nice fossil wallet.)
Okay apart from the presents, ive sent more msgs out this year as well.
i sent about 50plus plus plus msgs out on Christmas day itself.
sorry to those whom i sent double copies!
apparently nokia can mass send 20 msgs max per msg and then in the 2nd round i forgot who i stopped at.
hence the double sent msgs.
i did take note for the 3rd round though.

okayy my cousin and my grandparents cam over on Christmas day and we had alot of fun.
we laughed alot.
and alot of weird family facts were revealed!
I could have rolled on the floor laughing but of cos that wasnt polite.
but it was so hilarious.
and i was so glad my cousin came over too.
haven't seen her in a while..

i think manda and junwei have both influenced and me and made me take an interest in the 4 x 4 x 4 x rubik's cube.
i'm quite interested to try to solve one on my own without help..

anyway, its been five months since i had a haircut.
i've decided to grow it long.
so i'll be keeping the shape, even though its sort of slopping.
but i'll be layering it and thinning it.
perhaps in the first or 2nd wk of jan.

jan is gonna be a busy busy month.
alot of studying to do (for prelims)
and alot of driving lessons to take.
my test is on the 30th of jan and i want to ace it.
speaking of which, i had a lesson on monday, in which i learnt directional change.
and i have another lesson this saturday in the morning.
i hope i'll do as well as i did for the past 2 lessons.

my throat hurts like dingbats today.
just when i wanted to eat stuff that ive not eaten in a while!
cut me some slack nature!
its my holiday!

oh yes, ive given my crutches to my friend who has a hairline crack in her ankle from a fall.
take care yeah!
i do hope the crutches will help u as much as it helped me get around til i had it twisted back into position by the sinseh.
haha.

anyw, been marathoning the oc season 4.
so im off to see the last episode now.
=)

2007-12-21T23:52:00.000+08:00

I went for the morning sociology class on tuesday and i conclude that my lecturer is really not bad afterall.
he gives plenty of examples to complement his notes, although i still find it abit too brief.
having said that, i try to write down all his examples but he talks really fast like a bullet train and i can barely catch up.
anyw, i grabbed the tuesday socio notes to help me out as well.
of all the 4 subs i take, i thik socio is the most mind-draining.

anyway, the girls and i wore green and red on wednesday.
after our last socio lesson, khai drove us to Plaza Singapura (Thanks plenty Khai! Much appreciated!)
We didnt make a reservation so we had to wait it out.
Our intended destination was pizza hut but we ended up in secret recipe.
took random pics, some in my facebook and friendster.
really had lots of fun.
time flies (or jets rather) when u're not looking.
its been 5 months since i first knew them!
and its been great!

yesterday was the pageant/bash at zouk.
it was a blast...
helped out where i could during the pageant.
and then after i was dismissed from my duties, i joined angeline and stephanie.
it was really fun.
i got so thirsty after that i ordered vodka lime.
not bad.
but it definitely killed my pocket.
and the taxi fare was worse!
the taxi fare came up to half my weekly allowance!

live, love, laugh.

let the celebrations begin!

2007-12-18T16:39:00.000+08:00

REPOST

Event: SIM - UOL Pageant.
Date: 20th December 2007
Venue: Zouk
Ticketing: 10pax - $16 each
Less than 10pax / individual - $18 each
At the door on actual day - $22 each

Ticket includes 1 free drink.
1 for 1 applies on all drinks (except bottled ones) after 12MN.
Last entry at 230am.

all are welcomed!

Please do support us! thanks!

2007-12-17T15:33:00.000+08:00

Listening to: Apologise. Its too late, its too late to apologise.

This year, my sister is spending Christmas in singapore for the first time in 3 years.
and of cos the new year.
its been rather quiet the past few years but now that she's back, i think it would defintely be much better.
its like the whole family's together again u know.
anyway, and then my sister did something which i really clearly did not expect like at all.
she got me the oc season 4 dvd!
THANK YOU SIS! MUCH APPRECIATED.
becos i really wanted to get it already but i was holding back becos of the price.
and my sister works really hard.
i do feel very bad that she got it for me.

Amanda has introduced me to gossip girl and i cant load the 6th episode.
does anyone have a link to a workable one?

anyway, so this week is the last week of studies for the year.
in fact, wednesday is the last day.
and then i have my 1 and a half week of break.
sch starts again on 2nd jan which is very depressing becos the start of jan marks the beginning of many many things, which i will elaborate another time.
so i started my monday in a limbo at home doing really i have no idea what.
im going for the morning sociology class tmr to see how its like.
a friend of me goes for it and says its really not bad.
its not that i dislike my own lecturer or anything.
or perhaps i really take time learning things.
everytime i leave a lecture theatre, i always reflect on what i've learnt on my 1 and a half hour bus ride home.
and usually, i can remember what i've roughly learnt for that day even though the rest have been pretty much forgotten.
but for sociology, i cant even remember a single thing.
i always have to dig my notes out and reread them all over again.

anyway, my last lesson is on wednesday.
and then peageant/bash is on thursday.
do support us ya!
tickets will also be selling at the door.

My church has a church service in the morning this sunday.
its a christmas service and im inviting everyone to just come for it.
its at the indoor stadium.
there will be a free shuttle bus to and fro from kallang.
shuttle buses begin at 9am.
the service starts at 10am.
so do drop by and experience it!
for those who have been trying to get seats in the main audi, here is ur chance!
instead of always getting a seat in the overflow rooms.

alright, i have to run now.
i have a million things to do.
tata for now.

2007-12-13T23:21:00.000+08:00

To entertain you guys who have been bored with my blog.

HAHA.

2007-12-09T22:42:00.000+08:00

Listening to:
Who knew by Pink

So i started my saturday morning with a swim at CSC.
Or okay i swam half of the time and the other half of the time was spent in the jaccuzi.
my record number of laps (sis told me that 1 lap = 2 x lengths. i didnt know..) was 2.5 laps non-stop.
but in total i think i only swam about 9 laps.
after that they wanted to go off already so had to stop to go shower..

someone came from my sister's blog to my blog and viewed all my archive files.
hello whoever you are!
yes now u know alot about me.
or my sister rather if u were trying to find out about her?
and someone has been visiting my boyfriend's blog even though its been dead for like 1 year.
hello yes its been dead!
haha okay lah. just being very nehneh here. heehee...

anyway, its been a very terrible week for me.
ive been feeling like crap becos of the all spade of events.
and i think friday was the last straw.
whatever lah huh. all part and parcel of life.
like my sis always say, "suck it up and live with it."
but anyway, I am in dire need of help for prep of cashflow statement for POA!
help with my POA assignment please!

been sneezing the entire day.
im sick again!
only becos it turned cold again.
now my nose is blocked up. =(

Oh yes, i can now solve the rubik's cube!
1/3 credits to manda, 2/3 credits to Junwei.
=)

next week i have driving lesson ~~twice~~ Once.
~~tuesday after lesson at 4pm (ciruit again. hope i'll do okay.)~~[cancelled becos he had to repair car for test for a tsuent tmr] and thurs before lecture at 1130 (road).
its the second last week of school before we go into holiday...
sch starts again 02 jan 08.
Christmas is coming! =))

okay im gonna talk about something quite sad here so the mood's gonna change abit.
if uncomfortable, u can stop reading and leave my blog.
This part of the post is for everyone who has ever lost anyone so dear to them.
Death.
Death is ruthless.
It comes without sign of its impending doom.
Its inevitable.
A Death will always have an impact on others.
and many of you think that this impact lasts only during the period of mourning.
but in fact, its lasts the entire lifetime.
Thats why we shld always always treasure the time we have on the earth and the people around us.
Don't turn back and say i wish i had never done this or i wish i had said this.
and for everyone else who had lost someone...
dont despair.
I think im in a position to say this becos my father passed away 12 years ago.
so no, im not talking crap.
and other than that i've seen many others go, others who were close.
others like the best friend whom i grew up with from church to pre sch to pri sch.
she lost both parents separately, parents whom i interacted alot with in church or whenever i dropped by their house.
and then one of my school mates passed away in sec 1.
she was the friend whom i sat beside in pri one.
we quarreled alot at first but in the end we actually became friends.
i've seen others despair too and i cant help but really feel it.
i cant help them yet it just pained me to see them so sad.
one of my ex-boyfriend's really really good friend passed on.
and i've seen the repercussions....
is pains me when people who are still living lost someone do dear to them.
when i see the dragon boat tragedy, i cry.
i feel for the families...
Jeremy Goh, Pageant Contest and SIM - UOL programme.
Will be missed by plenty.
But when i say dont despair.
i dont mean to forget and be merry.
I think u shld look back and remember all the times u've spent tog.
and someday, because death is inevitable, u will meet again...
life is gamble.
its a game that no one can predict.
we just need to live right and live with no regrets.

i know this post sounds very lame.
but im just voicing out my feelings....

In loving memory of everyone who has left this earth and left behind all their loved ones......

2007-12-07T01:21:00.000+08:00

I've lost alot of confidence in driving as i've been scolded plenty of times.
i'm not fast enough.
I'M NOT FAST ENOUGH?
driving at a speed of 40 - 45km along eunos is not fast enough?
right okay.
ive only driven a car 18 times...
but i have seen so much improvement from my last few driving experiences.
I can now gauge the distance required for the yellow boxes and hence i know how to stop in time so i wont end up in the yellow box.
I can stop before the stop line.
I can change down gear before stopping.
I can half clutch without stalling my engine when starting off from slopes.
I can be the first one to move off when the light turns green in a three-laned junction.
I can effectively choose the correct gear for the different traffic situations so as to move off smoothly and not stall the engine anymore.
I know i can do this.
My instructor said alot of things which made me feel very demoralised.
But i will hold it in.
every single word he said.... I will not let it get me down.
I need the courage to overcome this.
I have to pass my driving. I am officially funding the entire driving fee on my own.
I've returned my mum the amt i owed her and thereafter, everything else comes from my bank.
i need this.
i need to pass my driving.
I NEED TO BE BRAVE.

2007-12-02T23:35:00.000+08:00

I woke up this morning and switched on my handphone while i was still half asleep.
yes, i usually do this whenever i wake up.
and then with one blur eye opened, i keyed in my security code and closed my eye.
and then suddenly my phone vibrated a few times. incoming messages.
at this time of the day???
it was only 9am.
i sat up and opened the messages and tada!
okay im so sorry i didnt tell you guys....
five people msged me asking me where i was at the standard chartered run.
yes, i didnt go.
i didnt see any reason to.
so for those who thought i was volunteering somewhere and wanted me to go find u guys,
im so sorry i wasnt there.
and im so sorry i replied back only at 9 plus am.
hahaha.
anyway, my sister wants to join the full marathon next year.
she's mad but she's definitely gamed for it.
running like twice a week or more than that, she's definitely gonna be prepared in time for th run next year.
i'm really not as mad as her.
i mean i would be as hyped up if
1. it was a volleyball competition
2. my knees were more functional.
none the less, i am considering the 10km one.
i said im considering ok.
considering.
considering.
....
ok and once again,
sorry to u guys who msged me n only got the reply so late!
so sorry!

one of my older cousins has given birth.
but then again, i was allocated the position of an aunt even before i was born.
i do have a nephew who is older than me by a year.
anyhow, this baby was really cute.
and for a one-monther it was really huge.
i didnt know babies became so huge after barely a month.
they are like eating machines who process food immediately into fats and what nots.
im kidding.

oh yah last week stephanie and i saw one of our lecturer walk past.
this lecturer is bald and has like fold lines at the back of his head.
the lines are like those of the fat fold lines you would see on one's tummy when seated.
and then she said, "His head is smiling at me." and then she did this like squeezing up of her face and smiling and it was just so funny lah.
i couldnt stop laughing.
hahaha.

okay next week..
monday run errand for my mum, no school.
tuesday class in the early afternoon.
wed driving and then class in the late afternoon.
thurs class in the late afternoon.
friday class in the morning.
sat nothing to do.
sunday church.
yeah my week quite boring.

anyway, im thinking about the dragon boat tragedy again and it really reminds me of death.
im feeling very sad about it and i wanted to say some things.
but im so tired i need to sleep.
thoughts aside,
soon i promise.
but then again i wldnt think it would be much of a suspense.
dont think its much of a big deal anyway.

GOODNIGHT WORLD.

2007-12-01T22:36:00.000+08:00

The past week has been a crazy week and im glad its over.
no wait, i take that back.
Why must time pass so fast?
I have alot to do which is mad.
but for now i need a break which is why im here.
hello. =)
ok i think the only song ive been listening to the past week is "worn me down" by rachel yamagata. (check out my prev post if you have no idea what im talking about).

Updates about the previous week..

Tuesday i had stats class til 3pm and then i studied for my giant sociology test in sch.
Met Libin, Bethia and Zhongfen (MAY!) like halfway.
or rather, they met me while searching for a place to study.
so i joined them.
and then council meeting at 630pm.
til like 930pm.
i reached home at about 11pm.
ate my dinner and took my bath.
slept at about 130am after reading some notes.

wednesday was the big test.
but i woke up at 7am anyway to see sister before she flew off to indonesia to defend this country of ours.
and then she left the house for the airport at about 8am.
and i tried to return to bed after that.
and then i woke again at 930am.
yes, crash course doesnt helpbut it wasnt counted as a crash course.
i studied whatever i needed to and i was just re-reading.
i have to remember like 7 or 8 historical sociologists and allllllll the theories.
why?
but in the end i think the test was okayyy.
i was like stumped on a few questions though.

i had my first circuit lesson for driving on thursday and i got scolded the entire time.
too slow, too fast, blah blah.
it was seriously breaking point for me.
i was okay on the road though.
got back my econs test and i did shit.

today i just stayed home the whole day and i did abit of sociology.
sister came back from her trip.

im still ill from the flu.
and my nose only acts up if its cold.
it was cold the entire day though.
the wind was ongoing for the entire day, no kidding.

i think i'll try to get up early tmr to do some work.
have to keep up for revision.
im so up to my neck for revision.
and then theres this family function in the evening tmr.

i wanted to talk about death and what my thoughts are but perhaps in the next post.
im really tired but ive got some stuff to settle online before zooming off to bed.

2007-11-26T17:58:00.000+08:00

Listening to: Worn me down by rachel yamagata (music from the oc season 2 episode 2 or 3 i think).

I love this song plenty!
sorry imeem doesnt have the full version.
so heres the youtube one.
video of summer (rachel bilson) and seth (Adam Brody) from the oc.

"Worn Me Down" BY Rachel Yamagata

Gone, she's gone
How do you feel about it
That's what I thought
You're real torn up about it
And I wish you the best
But I could do without it
And I will, because you've worn me down
Oh, I will, because you've worn me down

Worn me down like a road
I did everything you told
Worn me down to my knees
I did everything to please
But you can't stop thinking about her
No, you can't stop thinking about her

And you're wrong, you're wrong
I'm not overreacting
Something is off
Why don't we ever believe ourselves
And I, oh, I feel that word for you
And I will, because you've worn me down
Oh, I will because you have worn me down

Worn me down like a road
I did everything you told
Worn me down to my knees
I did everything to please
But you can't stop thinking about her
No, you can't stop thinking about her

She's so pretty; she's so damn right
But I'm so tired of thinking
About her tonight

Worn me down like a road
I did everything you told
Worn me down to my knees
I did everything to please
But you can't stop thinking about her
No, you can't stop thinking about her

Worn me down like a road
I did everything you told
Worn me down to my knees
I did everything to please
Worn me down like a road
I did everything you told to me to do
But you, you can't stop thinking about her
No, you can't stop thinking about her
No, you can't stop thinking about her
No, you can't stop thinking about her

___________________

Last week has been a bit of a mad mad week.
but i havent done enough studying or whatever.
all the local uni students are having their exams and are mugging like mad and that is definitely a moving factor to get my ass off and do some mugging as well.

okay im off to a slow start this week but more craziness entails, i forsee.
Tmr i have a stats lesson from 12 - 3 in school and then a Council meeting from 630 to like i have no idea what time but judging from the previous time, it shld be 8 or 9 plus.
wed is my big sociology test and i have to study for it soon.
Its a giant chapter that i need to get on top of but my mind's on information overload.
Thursday its driving in the morning and then econs lesson.
friday brings about the more than confusing POA class.

okay what else, i have no idea.
i just have plenty of catching up to do for every subject.

talk about responsibilities when you turn 19.
yeah, being 19 should definitely be all-time.

ok i gtg.
short post.
my mind is spinning.

2007-11-21T23:35:00.000+08:00

Listening to: Torn

Here are some random updates about the previous week.

On Thursday I had an econs test.
People were scribbling off symbols with arrows and short forms and here i was writing entire words and sentences like TOTAL EXPENDITURE HAS INCREASED. Pple just wrote TE (arrow up).
I only realised this when i cldnt finish the paper and had to hand it up and i peeped over at my friend's work.

And then I had POA test on friday.
My balance sheet couldnt balance.
short of $150 000.
Not cut out to be an accountant.
but i found my mistakes and then tada!
i balanced it.
but it was very very messy becos i cancelled everywhere and put numbers everywhere.
mental note to self: leave enough space for any additions in the future.

Some of you know that i had a place in RMIT reserved for me for the jan intake becos of some things that occured during my uni application.
u can refer back to my earlier posts if u dont know.
so they sent me the acceptance yesterday and i glady rejected the offer and wrote, "Already in SIM UOL. Please do give my space to someone who really needs it as i know how it feels!"
In fact i really do and its horrible.

oh yah sunday met robby and amanda for lunch.
manda and i went to my church first.
yaya the queueing church.
anyw, thanks guys for the topshop kisslock clutch/sling!
when u opened the i bag i was WAH.
so thanks to robby and manda.
=)
appreciate and it i will defintely carry it out one day let you see. haha.
oh and amanda taught me how to solve 1/3 of a rubik cube.
im looking forward to learning to solve the rest, so much so that i solve 1/3 of it like 5 times a day everyday.
haha

weather been a bit mad these days.
hot cold hot cold freezing burning.
im still down with the flu and its probably the unstable weather.

Driving tmr before lecture.
Friday morning lecture and then mugging in sch.
i have a test coming up next wk (sociology) and its a really huge chapter.
alot to remember about the founding fathers etc.

Ever since my 19th, i feel like its already a new year for me.
and i have some resolutions to make good.
i think for starters, i should put some things behind me.
no one else/nothing should run my life.
i live for myself and i live the way i want to (of cos i dont commit crime n arson n whatever lah).
the point is, im gonna try to make this work.
and i told amanda already.
and it will start this week.
its time to put all these behind me.
a year of events has passed and now i should put them aside and look to the future or else i will never move on and progress.

as for now, im gonna go with this motion in mind.